My Heart Will Go On
by eveningstar1996
Summary: After the Strigoi attack on St. Vladimir's, Dimitri decided to leave Rose for Tasha because he loves her. Seven years later, Rose and Dimitri are reunited at a Christmas visit to a ski lodge. Feelings begin to spark between the old lovers, but it won't be enough to bring them back to each other. But will Rose and Dimitri reunite after the secret behind their separation is revealed?
1. Can I Not?

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Vampire Academy.

* * *

Ch. 1 Can I Not?

"How could you do this to me?" I yelled at him.

"I realized…how much better it would be for me, if I were to be with Tasha instead of…you," Dimitri said, his voice thick. His voice shook a little.

"Oh, now you decide to take up on her offer? When Tasha offered you the option to be her guardian and have dhampir kids, that was Christmas. It's spring…and after the Strigoi attack, how could you think of leaving? We need you here." _I need you, Dimitri_._ Please don't leave me. _I hoped my face showed what I couldn't say. I wouldn't beg him to stay, no matter how much I wanted him to.

"Yes, but back then… I don't know. Now, I think I should've taken her offer. Luckily, she's still waiting for me." Dimitri couldn't meet my eyes as he spoke, and he kept his eyes firmly on the ground. His voice sounded dull.

"But…you said you loved me. That was why you didn't go with her." I hated how my voice trembled, revealing my emotions. Was I that weak, to reveal my emotions? _I can't break down in front of Dimitri_, I said to myself. _I won't give him that satisfaction_. "And what about last night…when we made love in the cabin?"

A brief burst of emotion flashed in Dimitri's eyes, but vanished before I could see what it was. "Roza…" I flinched at the use of his nickname for me. "I…that was…"

A cold realization spread through me. "You were using me the whole time, weren't you?" I asked. "Especially last night. You took advantage of me and had sex with me. That's all it was. It wasn't making love, it was just sex." I felt hurt and debased. That had been one of the most touching moments in our relationship, such as it was. We had given in to our love for each other. In the end, it had been only sex to him. Everything in our relationship was gone.

"Rose, that's not how it was-"

"It must've been, since you're leaving me now," I said bitterly, kicking at the ground. "Well, now it must be great for you. You can have all the sex you want with Tasha and make babies in the process. Why have me when you have such a better chance with Tasha?"

"Don't talk about Tasha like that!" Dimitri shouted, his eyes flashing with anger. I stood my ground, knowing he wouldn't hurt me. "I want to go with her because I love her."

I stared, feeling like the air had been knocked out of me. Had he just said what I thought I'd heard? "What the fuck did you say?" I gasped.

"I love Tasha. I want to be with her and raise a family. I'm so tired of fighting for other Moroi and risking my life when I'm out in the field."

This wasn't my Dimitri. It was like something had taken root inside him and changed my passionate lover into…a stranger. Hurt ached inside of me, and I fought back my urge to cry. I couldn't look weak in front of Dimitri.

"Have a good life," I said coldly, keeping my emotions off my face_. Don't you dare share him how upset you are_.

Uncertainty showed in Dimitri's eyes and he tentatively reached for me, before holding himself back. That was confusing, but I resolved to not let that crack me. Conflicting actions. "Fuck you, Dimitri. Since this is your choice, this is what you get. I hope you're happy with Tasha. I hope we never hear or see each other again. Don't you dare regret what you're doing. Goodbye forever."

I turned my back on him and walked away. A single tear slid down my cheek, but I kept walking, leaving the love of my life - and our shared memories - behind me.

* * *

_Seven years later…_

I can't believe that so much time has passed since the Strigoi attack. It feels like it was only a year ago the night that changed my life forever, but in reality, several years have passed.

Dimitri and I…we don't know anything about each other now. After the night he left me, I tried to forget him. I pretended – to those who had known about us, anyway – that I was okay, that it was better this way.

I'd finally had to tell Lissa and Christian about what I had once shared with _him_. Lissa had been sad and angry enough for the both of us – and I should know, since we share a bond – although she was shocked about our relationship, and surprised that she hadn't seen it in both of us.

As for Christian… he didn't quite know what to think. Tasha was his aunt, and she'd raised him after his parents were killed when they become Strigoi. She was the one who had raised him, and was like a mother to him. On the other hand, I was his friend. That left him in a very difficult situation, but I put on a good face and told him to visit her whenever he liked.

Lissa stayed with me whenever he went to Tasha. She was too loyal to me to visit the woman who had stolen my love away. I tried to encourage her to go, but she was far too stubborn to listen to me.

"I'm not going to that woman's house," she'd said haughtily the last time I'd tried to convince her – which was last year. "I support her position on Moroi fighting alongside guardians… but this? You said…that he had turned her down last time because of you. And now he changed his mind. What an asshole."

"But it's rude," I said, although I was secretly glad that she wasn't going. Selfish and petty of me, but how could I help it?

Lissa shook her head, refusing to dignify my comment with a response.

I had graduated at the top of my class, with full marks. After graduation, I went with Lissa and our other classmates to Court. I had gotten assigned to Lissa, much to our delight. I had worried that after my talk with Queen Tatiana herself (where she had implied she would try to keep me from being assigned to Lissa, and had yelled at me for a nonexistent affair between me and Adrian) that I wouldn't get assigned to her, but I was lucky.

Since Lissa was the only Dragomir, the last of her family, another guardian was assigned to her. My partner was Luc, a guardian who had attended school somewhere in France. He was pretty cute, with a laid-back, chill attitude, and was very dedicated to protecting Lissa. Eddie had gotten assigned to Christian.

I was glad that there was another guardian watching over Lissa besides me. I would give up my life for her if necessary, but I was glad for someone else to help me out.

Today was my – and Luc's, for that matter - day off. Lissa was strolling around Court with Christian. I wondered when they would get engaged. They'd been dating for over five years. Lissa wanted to get married to him, but Christian…to say he was a bit reluctant was an understatement.

I moodily lay down on my couch. I wondered what would have happened on my day off if things hadn't changed all those years ago… before he had left…

Whoa_._ Where had that thought come from? Stop_ thinking about him_, I chastised myself. _He's dead to you. Non-existent._

The problem? I wasn't sure if I could believe myself.

Lissa burst into my suite, her cheeks slightly pink from the cold. I smiled, welcoming the distraction from my gloomy thoughts. "Rose…I have some…interesting news."

I felt that warning feeling through the bond that told me I wouldn't like what she was about to say, and sat up, pushing my long hair away from my face. "Okay, Liss. Spill."

"Well…" She faltered, which was very unlike her. Although she wasn't as blunt as I could be, she was still rather straightforward about what she thought. It wasn't like her to be so wary.

"Do I actually have to go into your-"

_Tasha invited all of us to that ski lodge in Idaho for Christmas_, Lissa burst out quickly, cutting me off. _And by all of us, I mean all of us_._ We're supposed to be leaving in two days by private jet for that ski lodge._

I shot out of my lounging position on the couch. I stared at her in shock, feeling like my eyes would bug out of my head. I wanted to pinch myself and check if I was having a nightmare, but the uneasy feelings from Lissa told me otherwise. This was real life. "Are you fucking serious? There is no way in hell I'm going to be anywhere near that fucking she-devil! Can I not go?"

"It's just for a week," Lissa said tentatively.

"Just a week? I have to see the guy who _used_ to be the love of my life! And probably watch Tasha all over him and getting it on. I bet they have kids already," I spat bitterly. "Hello to Christian's cousins."

Lissa's eyes were wide and shocked. "Rose..?"

I realized I'd let some of my true emotions slip, and mentally cursed myself. _What happened to keeping your emotions bottled up?_ I smiled brightly, trying to put back the emotions I'd let slip out. "It's fine. We can go for a week."

Lissa pursed her mouth, and tilted her head. _You're not saying the whole truth. I know it's not fine. Let me tell Christian_. She started reaching for her phone, but I held up my hand.

"It's fine. Really." She looked far from convinced. "I'll be okay. Do you really want to ruin Christian's winter? He won't go this time without you, since you said we were all invited. Besides, it's a freaking _ski lodge_. I'm sure I'll be fine."

"Fine," Lissa groused, getting to her feet. "I assure you I'm not any happier than you are." Which was funny, because before I lashed out, she'd temporarily tried to convince me to go with them. She muttered something under her breath, and stalked out.

I sighed and lay my head back down on the pillows. No matter what I told everyone… I still hurt over him. Dimitri. The man who had once understood me better than anyone else in the world. The one who had once been my soulmate, my true love. _Why did you leave me?_ I wondered miserably, playing with a lock of my hair. Everything was almost perfect.

Nothing in our relationship had ever been truly perfect, especially given how we'd had to hide it, our duties as guardians, and the condemnation we would have faced for a dhampir-dhampir relationship, not to mention the teacher-student part…but before the rescue mission, it had seemed perfect. We had almost found a way to work things out. Until he told me he wanted to be with Tasha, and ruined it all.

_Thanks for fucking up my life_, I thought darkly, but cut off that thought._ No. I said I would stop thinking about him, and I will. It will be like nothing happened between us. We are two separate people. He only used to be your mentor, and that's that_.

I stared blankly across the room. Several years ago, when Dimitri had considered Tasha's offer before declining her the first time, we had gone to the exact same ski lodge we were now going. Was this God's way of punishing me? A visit to the ski lodge...with Tasha and him. It would bring up painful memories. This was going to be the most fucked-up, depressing Christmas ever.

* * *

**Author's note**: Another Dimitri - leaves - Rose - for Tasha story :P And yes, the beginning is a lot like my first story (am I copying myself? hahaha, but it's mainly because I think this is a good way of starting the story). But it's going to be different, compared to _Fighting Against Love_. Reviews/ideas appreciated :]


	2. A Passing Glance

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Vampire Academy.

* * *

Ch. 2 A Passing Glance

Dimitri POV

"Christian just called to confirm that he's coming," Tasha said, setting down the phone. "We'll be heading out to the ski lodge tomorrow."

I raised my eyebrow at her. "That seems awfully short notice to get plane tickets, Tasha."

"Yes, but I got them for us beforehand," she admitted sheepishly, a smile curving across her pink lips. "It's like a celebration for us, an anniversary present."

I stiffened at her words. "We're not married, Tasha."

"But we've been together for so long...I don't get why after seven years, you still won't marry me," she murmured, turning away from me. I didn't have to look at her to see the hurt in her pale blue eyes.

Seven years had passed since the Strigoi attack on the Academy, and since I had left Rose. Whenever I closed my eyes, I could see her face, full of hurt and heartbreak when I had told her that I was leaving to be with Tasha. Guilt ate at me sometimes for breaking her heart like that, especially with what we had once shared. Still, my memories of her were starting to fade and get fuzzy, which I found concerning. Although I had chosen to be with Tasha instead of stay on at the Academy, I could not, would not marry Tasha.

I didn't understand why myself. Every year, Tasha would propose to me, asking me to marry her. Every time, I turned her down. She was getting impatient and wanted us to marry soon. It wasn't that I was afraid of the commitment. If we'd gotten married by now, we probably would have had children – dhampir children, since Moroi and dhampirs getting together produced dhampirs.

And yet…something held me back. I was reluctant to accept whenever Tasha proposed to me, and so I always declined her. Besides my refusal to marry her, our relationship was pretty good. Most of the time, anyway.

"I know you're not afraid to commit to me," Tasha continued, breaking my reflective thoughts. "I mean…you left the Academy and your assignment to Lissa so we could be together. So, I still don't understand…"

I shook my head, feeling frustrated. This was the one sore point in our relationship – why I wouldn't agree to marry her. Something was always holding me back. I would never admit it to her, but I was secretly glad that this something – whatever it was – was holding me back from becoming engaged to her.

Then her earlier words about Christian truly sank in, and I frowned. Trying to keep my voice neutral, I asked, "Is anyone coming with Christian?"

"Oh, just Lissa and Adrian," Tasha said carelessly, moving down the hall to our room. I froze. "I did tell them to invite whoever else they wanted, but I guess they're not going to. Hurry up and start packing!"

I couldn't move. I was rooted to the place where I stood. Vasilisa was coming. And that meant…_she_ would be coming.

I knew that she'd been assigned to Vasilisa after they had graduated, which made me proud. When I had first started training her, I could see that although she wasn't doing so well, she had the makings of a dedicated guardian, and I had been right. Now she was probably one of the best guardians around – which was especially good, since Vasilisa was the last of her line, the Dragomir princess.

Seven years had passed since I had left. How would things between us be, now that we were to come face to face for the first time in years?

* * *

Rose POV

"Are you even going to have a liver left?" I asked Adrian, who was already on his second glass of champagne within the first hour of our flight.

"Little dhampir, this will make me healthier," he declared, raising his glass in a mock toast to me, his green eyes sparkling with mischief.

Thomas – the guardian that had come along to guard Adrian – chuckled in amusement. We had a little party of seven on our private jet, along with several other important Moroi.

I shook my head, deciding not to dignify Adrian's remark with a response. I knew Adrian drank to mute the effects of spirit, but still…in the long run, I doubted that it would be very healthy for him.

Lissa sighed and shook her head, leafing through a magazine. _He'll never listen to anyone about alcohol. He just wants to control spirit_.

"Yeah, but…"

_Oh, he'll never change. Just take a nap. It's going to be another three or four hours till we arrive at the lodge_.

I decided to take her advice and take a nap. When I woke up, we were descending at the airplane strip at the lodge. Outside, the sun shone brightly on the snow, which was pristine and pure white. I guessed that it must've just snowed before we had landed.

"What time is it?" I asked groggily.

"It's around noon," Eddie piped in. "Tasha and Dimitri should already have arrived. We'll meet them in the lobby."

My stomach twisted at his name, and my eyes felt like they were about to tear up. I turned away from the others, pretending to brush my hair away from my face.

_Rose. Are you okay?_ Lissa asked. I ignored her question, pretending to be preoccupied with staring out the window.

I felt someone walk over and take the seat next to me. "Are you okay?" It was Adrian.

"I'm fine," I muttered.

He let out an exhale, and I could smell the alcohol on his breath.

When we got off the plane, it was freezing, despite the golden midday light. I was grateful I was wearing my parka, but even that didn't keep me completely warm.

We walked into the ski resort, and I recognized it from seven years ago. It still looked the same – three stories of gleaming, golden-colored wood and tall gracefully arched tinted windows. The mountains that rose up around us were breathtaking and majestic. I could see nothing but snow and pine trees.

I smiled with delight once we stepped into the lobby, which was much warmer than outside. Again, it was the same as the first time I'd come here – beautiful and opulent, with a cathedral ceiling and with a red, black, and gold color scheme.

"Where are they?" Christian wondered.

"Christian!" a familiar voice rang out.

I winced at the sound of that voice. Tasha was here. I looked down at the floor for a moment before I looked up and pasted a fake smile on my face.

Tasha ran towards Christian and gave him a hug for a moment before they pulled away. She still looked as stunning as ever, dressed in a blue sweatshirt that was the exact shade of her ice blue eyes and jeans. Her long jet-black hair was pulled back in a loose bun, and the scars on her face – from when Christian's parents had attacked her after they turned Strigoi – were quite visible, yet didn't take away from her distracting beauty.

She greeted everyone very warmly…but there was a noticeable coolness when she hugged me, and she didn't seem as friendly as she was to everyone else. "Hello, Rose," she said, and the coolness in her voice could've matched her eyes.

"Hi, Tasha," I said neutrally, keeping all my emotions off my face. Lissa tensed from where she stood beside me, and I could feel the anger sweeping through her.

I concentrated on trying to pull the anger out of her, but I couldn't pull it all out. _Don't even think about it_, she warned.

Tasha turned to Luc and Thomas with a smile. "I don't believe you've met my guardian, but here he is. Dimitri, meet Luc and Thomas."

My heart raced as Dimitri stepped up beside her, and shook hands with Luc and Thomas. "Nice to meet you, Luc and Thomas."

I almost melted at the sound of his voice, which still had a faint Russian accent. I stared at him discreetly, taking in his features. That dark brown hair that was soft as silk…those dark warm brown eyes, which were like pools of liquid chocolate when he laughed…and that gorgeous smile. Oh, God. Even after all this time…

_Stop it. He's not yours. He's probably married to Tasha with three kids or something_, I told myself sternly.

Despite my thoughts to myself to not react, I couldn't help it. I could feel how fast my heartbeat was going. I wouldn't be surprised if my cheeks were warm.

Dimitri then turned to me, and his smile vanished when he saw it was me. His eyes widened, and I could see his breathing had gotten a bit faster. I could practically taste the tension in the air crackling between us. "Rose…it's been years."

"Guardian Belikov," I said politely. "It's nice to see you again."

He flinched at my use of his formal name. Back at the Academy, I had teased him by calling him Comrade. Not anymore.

Emotion flashed in his dark eyes. I strained to see what it was, and for a moment, I could see regret and longing in his eyes. _Impossible_, I scolded myself. But I could see that he was struck by me…perhaps almost as much as I was struck by him. He looked almost the same as seven years ago, when I'd last seen him. Perhaps even more gorgeous.

My skin tingled like electricity had shot through me as we shook hands. From his reaction, I could tell that he had felt the electricity as well. A look passed between us for a moment, but it was full of meaning that I couldn't understand. _But why would he feel the electricity?_ I wondered. In my side vision, I could see that Tasha was _not_ happy at all. Her blue eyes flashed with anger, and I could almost feel her hostility in the air.

"You two know each other?" Luc inquired, looking between us.

"He was my mentor at the Academy," I said, smiling as pleasantly as I could as we let go of our hands. I instantly mourned the loss of skin contact and berated myself. "We fell out of contact when he left following the Strigoi attack to guard Tasha Ozera."

As everyone else continued with pleasantries, I thought back to that look in Dimitri's eyes and the feelings it awakened in me. Damn it. I had wanted so badly to be over Dimitri by now, to forget about him like he had about me.

Instead, it seemed that he hadn't forgotten me, which caused my heart even more turmoil than before. And…it seemed that I was still deeply in love with him.


	3. Adrian's Offer

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Vampire Academy.

* * *

Ch. 3 Adrian's Offer

"Who's up for some skiing?" Tasha asked with a smile.

Adrian checked his watch. "It's supposed to be midnight, and I think all of us are a bit jetlagged. Maybe we should sleep for a few hours so we can catch up with our normal schedule."

"That's the smartest thing I've ever heard you say," I quipped.

He rolled his eyes at me, and affectionately shoved my shoulder. "Little dhampir, even you have to admit I have occasional brilliant moments."

I shook my head, smiling. Over his shoulder, I could see Dimitri stonily regarding us. There was a storm of emotions in his face, and one I caught looked surprisingly close to jealousy_. Why would he be jealous if I'm close to Adrian? _I thought defiantly. _Adrian's my friend, and I can be friends with whoever the hell I like._

Tasha whispered something into his ear. There was a confused expression on his face, but the stormy emotions I had seen on his face vanished. His face became perfectly smooth and emotionless.

Huh. That was weird. What had Tasha said to him to make him hide his emotions like that? I felt like there was something weird about the interaction, but I couldn't put my finger on it. _It doesn't matter whether Dimitri's and Tasha's relationship is good or bad, or if they have weird moments_, I sternly told myself.

"We got here about an hour ago," Tasha said, "and I'm perfectly fine."

"Maybe because you didn't have to fly as far as we did," I shot back without thinking.

"Not our fault that we live closer to Idaho than the rest of you," she said coldly, emphasizing "we."

The hostility between us was even more obvious than before. Christian looked extremely uncomfortable at the animosity between me and his aunt. I could feel Lissa's anger at Tasha coming through the bond, which only added to my own. Adrian looked as carefree as ever, even though I could tell even he was uneasy in this tense atmosphere. Luc, Thomas, and Eddie looked between us, utterly confused.

Dimitri stepped in between us, and the air got thicker. "Calm down, you two," he said lightly. His eyes lingered on me for a moment before he turned to Tasha. "Adrian does have a point. They just got in. Let's sleep until around seven in the evening, and then we'll meet downstairs again."

"Fine," Tasha grumbled. "I suppose some sleeping won't do us any harm."

_God. She makes it sound like it's such a pain to let us sleep after we just flew in,_ Lissa groused after we checked in at the front desk and went upstairs in an elevator. The ski lodge was only three stories high, but it was a huge building.

I shrugged, but I had to agree with her. Tasha sounded so bitchy and annoyed, like it was a big inconvenience. We all got off on the same floor, but Tasha and Dimitri were on the other side of the building from us. I felt a pang in my heart.

_Were they already married?_ I couldn't help but wonder. I didn't even want to think about what they'd be up to if they were married or even just engaged, but it was natural for a couple that had been together for seven years to have gotten married –

Eddie broke into my thoughts when he announced our room assignments, which were basically just the Moroi with their guardians. Even though the ski lodge was a highly secured location, guardians would still be on guard with their charges.

Since Luc and I were guarding Lissa, it was three to a large suite. The suite had a bedroom, living room area, and a huge bathroom. It was much like the suite I'd shared with Lissa all those years ago the first time we had come here. Plush carpet, king-size beds, French doors, a two-person hot tub… And all the accommodations were luxurious and top of the line.

I laid down my suitcase on the floor and promptly jumped onto one of the king beds. "This should be my bed," I announced, rolling over on my side and hugging one of the pillows.

"Hey! What about me?" Luc demanded as Lissa sat down on the other king-sized bed.

Lissa pursed her lips. "I could always share with Rose."

"Just make him sleep on the floor," I teased, but slid off the bed and went over to Lissa's. "Then again, we're probably going to be taking shifts at night."

"You don't really need to," Lissa said, "since the wards will protect us."

"But what about what happened at the Academy all those years ago?" I asked her softly. "And there hasn't been much about the Moroi going on the offense against the Strigoi."

Lissa flinched. The attack on the Academy was a painful memory for both of us, even if she hadn't had to see most of the attack. And as for the Moroi going on the offense…that topic had come up about seven years ago, but not much had been done about it. If Lissa could actually have her family's seat on the royal council, which advised Queen Tatiana, that wouldn't be a problem. We were hoping she could get her seat soon.

"Well…when you put it that way," she said uneasily. Other thoughts were swirling through her mind.

"That's settled," Luc said as he sat down on the bed I'd just vacated.

There was a knock on the door, and we all turned to look at it. Who would be here so soon after we'd just settled in?

"It's Adrian," Lissa said, and I could tell from her thoughts she had sensed him because of his aura.

Lissa and Adrian are both spirit users. Spirit is a very rare element with some amazing psychic abilities, but we'd discovered it back when we were at St. Vlad's. So far, they were the only known spirit users, although the queen had been trying to find others for the past few years.

However, spirit had some nasty side effects. If a spirit user used too much, it would lead to depression and insanity. And if a spirit user was bonded to another person, that person would absorb the dark feelings from the spirit user and eventually become depressed or insane. Either way…one person would go insane.

Lissa opened the door, and Adrian was standing there. He looked as handsome as ever, with his stylishly mussed dark hair and emerald green eyes. I could tell that he was uneasy and had something to say.

"Hey, can I speak to Rose privately for a moment?" he asked.

Lissa and Luc stared in astonishment. _Uh oh. This can't be good_. I opened my mouth to protect, but Lissa recovered herself and cut me off. "Uh, sure. I'll just go to Christian's."

I shot her a death glare, but she smiled cheerily and exited the room with Luc trailing behind. _Have fun with Adrian!_ she said, sounding very smug. _I'm off to…be busy with Christian_. "Be busy" translated into some form of clothing removal. Unfortunately, I had seen way too many of her romantic escapades with Christian through the bond.

"So why are you here?" I asked as I closed the door behind Lissa. Now that Lissa and Luc were gone, it wasn't so awkward. _What was there to worry about to begin with? _

Adrian exhaled loudly and ran his hands through his hair, which was a sign that he was agitated. "Uhm…" He sounded really uncomfortable but took a deep breath. "When you touched hands with Dimitri, your aura…"

My cheeks flushed, although I didn't understand why. Yeah, I wasn't over Dimitri, but why would I blush? It didn't necessarily mean that I still loved him. It just meant I had a really hard time letting go of the past, but the pain wasn't as intense as it was right after he'd left me.

"There's really nothing to say," I interrupted. "Dimitri and I were over a very long time ago."

Adrian studied me, his green eyes narrowed. I could tell that he didn't agree with me. I didn't want to think about what he would've said if I'd let him continue about my aura. I was grateful that Lissa's ability of seeing auras wasn't as skilled as his, as mean as it was to think. "Fine. But I just wanted to suggest something. Something that pertains to your Russian mentor."

It was my turn to narrow my eyes at him. "What is it?"

He shifted uncomfortably and then sat down on my bed. "You're messing the bed," I warned.

He snorted. "Like you care if the bed is messed up." I laughed at that.

An uncomfortable silence hung between us for a moment before he spoke. "I know…it'll be hard for you to be around him, especially since now he's with Tasha." I opened my mouth, although I wasn't sure what I was going to say before he held up his hand. "No, no, don't deny it. I don't plan on telling anyone about it, but I can say that Tasha wasn't very happy with your appearance."

"I bet everyone felt it," I grumbled. "I'm surprised Eddie, Luc, and Thomas haven't yet ganged up on me to interrogate me."

"Anyway. I know it upsets you whenever you see them together…so maybe I could pretend to be your boyfriend and get him jealous."

My mouth fell open and I closed it. I was shocked by his suggestion. Adrian pretend to be my boyfriend?

"Like he would care," I scoffed, but I was intrigued by the idea. And would Dimitri really care if I was dating someone else? The possibility was unlikely, but I really wanted to see his reaction.

"Believe me, he would," Adrian said bitterly. _Why was he so bitter?_ I wondered, but decided there were things better unknown.

"But why would you offer to fake being my boyfriend?" I asked, eyeing him suspiciously. It was no secret he liked me – or wanted to get me into bed – and I suspected that he had a motive.

Adrian looked at the floor. "Well, you know how my feelings towards you are. So that's part of it. And also…you've been really depressed since he left, all those years ago. I know it's not spirit-related because normally you would get very angry, not depressed. Maybe this might eventually help you heal."

I frowned at him, even though I liked the idea of making Dimitri jealous. "And isn't it kind of mean just to use you for the sole reason of pissing Dimitri off?"

Now he really seemed uncomfortable and turned away. "Oh, it's nothing. I'm just a notorious playboy. I break hearts, little dhampir. I don't ever have my heart broken for a reason."

I sensed that wasn't entirely true. I was pretty sure he was upset how I wouldn't accept him, and yet…I knew deep in my heart that I wasn't Adrian's true love. Even if I accepted and started dating him, something wouldn't be right. Besides, he was a Moroi royal and I was a guardian. We probably wouldn't have a very long relationship anyway. And there was that incident during the first time I'd gone to Court, when the queen herself had yelled at me to stay away from Adrian because I was a cheap dhampir girl…

But I so wanted to get back at Dimitri, even if it was very mean and petty. He deserved a taste of his own medicine after leaving me for Tasha so coldly and unexpectedly. Maybe someday he would realize that I was the only one who would love him like that.

I knew he and Tasha went way back, although I wasn't sure how long they'd known each other. He'd told me once that it had been easy to be with her because she was just his friend. And yet, he hadn't been able to confide his true, deep feelings to her. I had scared him a little by how much I managed to understand him without him having to say much. We had been perfect for each other before he broke up with me, if "broke up" was the right word to use.

I looked up at Adrian, finally sorting out my tangled thoughts. "Can you give me a little more time to think about this? I'll give you an answer soon."

"Alright." He got up to leave, and then turned towards me, his eyes softening. "Rose…I won't expect a real relationship between us. Your heart is still…"

He trailed off, and I prompted, "Still…?"

"You're still heartbroken. You try your best to put on a good face for Lissa and everyone else. We've been friends for a much shorter time than you have been with her, but I know you're still trying to mend. Lissa won't say anything because…well, that's how she is. She won't bring up uncomfortable topics unless you talk first. But as for me, just say the word and I'll go beat him up any day."

This brought a faint smile to my face. Adrian, the playboy royal, beating up Dimitri, the most kickass guardian in the world besides my mother? That was truly funny. "Thanks."

Adrian winked and then left, shutting the door quietly behind him.

I lay down on my bed, considering his offer in all my crazily spinning thoughts. I couldn't believe that he'd offered to fake being my boyfriend so I could piss him off. _Very_ un-Adrian-like, and he did plenty of outrageous things all the time. I wondered if in a way, he wanted to get back at Dimitri for being the one who'd had my heart and ensuring he would never be the one I loved.

Showing Dimitri that I'd moved on when that wasn't exactly true probably wouldn't be good for me. It would be best to show that I was single and ready to hook up with a hot guy - there'd been plenty of hot eyecandy I'd spotted at this lodge - but I wanted revenge in a more vindictive way. It was immature and juvenile to want to get back at him for something that had happened so many years ago, but I wanted to hurt him how he'd hurt me, like a child. To hell with being the mature one.

A slow smile spread over my lips. Rose Hathaway the heartbreaker was back, and ready for some action.

* * *

**Author's note**: Dundundun. Mix Rose with her desire for revenge on Dimitri... and the results are going to be bad for Dimitri :P I credit Romitri for the idea of getting Rose to pretend to be with Adrian (this is more and more like my other story _Fighting Against Love_, but with an extremely bitchy Tasha and jealousy). Leave reviews/ideas, since they're always appreciated as always ;D Happy (late) Valentine's Day!


	4. Jealous

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Vampire Academy.

* * *

Ch. 4 Someone is Jealous

Dimitri POV

"Just go relax," I encouraged Tasha, who seemed torn between going to one of the spas or staying in our room with me. "You could use the relaxation."

"Fine," Tasha conceded with a slight smile. "I'll just pretty myself up a little. Be back in three hours!"

With that she left, and I was alone. I appreciated the alone time because it was very rare that I was away from Tasha. Sometimes I just needed time to think or read a Western novel.

A sad smile tugged at the corners of my lips. Rose used to tease me about reading Westerns and my long duster.

_You can't fool me, comrade. You want to put on a cowboy hat and keep lawless bank robbers in line._

Remembering that exchange made me sad. Remembering any of my memories with Roza – especially that last night in the cabin – made me feel sad and guilty for hurting her so much. And yet when I was around Tasha, I didn't think too much about Rose. Why was it that I only thought about her in the rare times I wasn't with Tasha? Was it because I didn't want to feel guilty that I was thinking of another woman besides my girlfriend?

It was strange. Even after all these years, I had trouble referring to Tasha as my girlfriend. More like "friends with benefits" would be a more accurate term, given our sex life. I winced, and quickly decided to think of something else.

Rose…She looked so beautiful and gorgeous when I'd seen her down in the lobby. Her dark eyes still held the passion and fierce will that she'd always carried within herself…and yet, it had seemed like she had lost something. I could see sadness lingering in her eyes. I knew it was my fault. She had been so full of life and energy seven years ago…and now it was partially gone.

I slammed my fist against the bed. Why? What exactly had caused me to leave Rose for Tasha? I had the vague feeling if I could get to the root of the problem, then I'd be moving a step closer to healing the rift between me and Rose…but…

_Stop thinking about Rose_, a voice whispered. It was that voice that didn't sound like mine, but sounded like someone…

I frowned. This had happened rather frequently over the past seven years – around the time I'd left Rose for Tasha. I'd never told Tasha about the "voice" that always crept into my thoughts whenever I thought of Rose. Was it my guilty conscience telling me to not think of Rose and focus on my girlfriend?

I had to do something about Rose's broken heart. I couldn't stand to see her in pain and know that it was pain that _I_ had caused.

* * *

Rose POV

"Taking a shower makes me feel like a new woman!" I announced after I stepped out of my shower and got dressed in several layers of warm clothes.

"You took forever in the shower," Lissa grumbled as I came out of the bathroom. My shower had been awesome.

"Hey, you're the one who takes forty-five minutes every morning to shower before school," I reminded her as I flopped down on my bed.

She shook her head before grabbing a pair of ski goggles and her hat. "Time to get bundled up for hitting the runs."

We met everyone else in the lobby. I went out of my way to stand beside Adrian and smile at him flirtatiously.

"Are you taking me up on my offer?" he asked me quietly, being sure to keep his voice low so no one else would hear us. Lissa looked over at us and raised her eyebrows. _You've got to tell me what's going on once we come back_, she said.

I smiled at Adrian. "Keep it quiet until someone asks," I said mischievously. "This should be fun."

At that moment, Tasha and Dimitri arrived. My heart twisted in my chest when I saw him, but I fought back my dark feelings. I was going to pretend I'd gotten over him and to do that, I couldn't let my heartbreak distract me.

"Who's ready to ski?" Tasha asked, her blue eyes sparkling with excitement. I couldn't help but feel envious as I took in her features.

"I'm definitely not," Luc muttered. "I've barely gone skiing before."

I turned to stare at him. "Aren't you from France?"

"What about it?" he demanded, his French accent becoming more pronounced.

"Then shouldn't you have been skiing before?"

"When I was like six," he grumbled, pushing his hair out of his face. "I've forgotten how to ski!"

"You could always take skiing lessons with the five and six year olds," Adrian suggested, sounding like he was going to choke on his laughter.

"I'll get you back for that!" Luc threatened as we headed out the door and into the snow.

It was now dark, but the moonlight illuminated everything. Our superior eyesight helped us see everything.

Guardians were patrolling the slopes as Moroi and dhampirs skied and sledded down hills. Whoops and yells echoed around us.

We rented some skiing equipment before heading towards a slope. Sad memories washed over me as I strapped my skis on. The last time I'd been here, Mason had been still alive. We'd dared each other to ski down a very dangerous course that had led to him breaking his ankle.

"Don't be so sad," Adrian said, placing his hand on my shoulder. His touch comforted me, and I looked over at him. "Just move on and think of the future."

I wondered how he knew I was sad, then realized he must've looked at my aura. He might've not been able to know exactly what I was thinking, but he knew I was sad.

I smiled at him briefly, before turning back to the slopes. "Are you ready to be able to keep up with me?"

"Hey, if I did, I'd probably crash into a tree," he said, gesturing to the numerous pine trees.

"Try to catch up with me, Ivashkov," I called, putting on my hat.

Rose, if you're trying to make him jealous, you're doing a great job, Lissa said wryly. Look at him.

I let myself "see" through her eyes. She was standing with Christian, but her gaze was on Dimitri. He was staring over in my direction, and there was a slight hint of _jealousy_ in his dark brown eyes. His aura was ringed with dark green, which was a clear giveaway, but much to my surprise, a transparent color ringed the green and the green vanished.

What the _fuck_ was that? Had Dimitri just wiped his aura clean of jealousy?

_!_

Lissa's surprise added to my own. I stared at him through my own eyes and blinked before turning to Adrian.

"I need to talk to you about auras later," I whispered, feeling strangely uneasy even though I didn't understand why.

He nodded and gestured to the slopes, appearing to be very lighthearted and cheery. "Ladies first. Show me the famous Hathaway Jump."

I snorted and took off down the slope.

It was a complete rush, with the cold air and the wind blowing my hair back from my face. Everything whizzed past me so fast that objects appeared to be blurs. I skidded gracefully to a stop at the bottom of the hill a few seconds later and looked up.

"I honestly don't know how you got down there so fast without breaking an arm," Lissa called down the hill.

I shrugged. "That was just a warm up. Hurry up before I turn into a snow woman!"

Everyone soon skied down to join me, although Tasha appeared to want Dimitri to ski by her side. "Come on, Dimka," she complained. "I want you at my side as we ski downhill!"

"Tasha, I'll just meet you at the bottom," Dimitri said, infinitely patient as ever. "Ladies first."

Tasha flipped her black hair back and muttered something under her breath. She then pushed off with her skis and was soon skiing downhill towards us, leaving a trail behind her in the snow.

Dimitri then followed after her, and I couldn't help but admire how graceful he was as he skied down. How was it that he seemed to be perfect in everything he did, from fighting Strigoi to skiing?

I was broken out of my thoughts by Adrian resting his hand against my arm. "Where to next, little dhampir?" he asked. Little puffs of air came out as he spoke.

"Why does _she_ get to decide where we get to go next?" Tasha broke in before I could answer. "Shouldn't I be the one deciding what we do, since I'm the one who invited everyone?"

"You don't have to be so pushy, Tasha," Dimitri remarked mildly, raising his eyebrow at her. I stared at him in disbelief for a moment. Was he trying to get his girlfriend – or fiancée or wife or whatever – to be less bitchy to me? That made me raise my opinion of him by a little bit.

"Why not?" Tasha asked loudly enough for everyone to be heard by her.

Christian looked uncomfortably between us. "You guys, calm down."

Lissa crossed her arms over her chest, narrowing her green eyes. _Tasha's being such a bitch_, she said. _I think she's worried you'll steal him away. She's hardly one to talk since she stole him from you_.

"Let's just keep going downhill," Dimitri finally said, looking between us uneasily. His eyes lingered on me, and I felt a spark of connection for just a moment before he looked away.

* * *

We finally finished skiing a few hours later, and towards the end, me throwing a snowball at Adrian had resulted in a snowball right. Tasha had called it "childish" and "immature" so she hadn't participated. Dimitri hadn't participated in the snowball fight at first, but finally decided to join in, much to my surprise. He'd even ended up on the same team as me, which made my heart flutter. Judging from Tasha's expression, she'd been far from pleased, but she couldn't boss Dimitri around.

We finally returned to the lodge, where we warmed up near some fireplaces with hot chocolate. Adrian lazily stretched his legs out on the couch, which earned him horrified looks from several of the staff walking past.

I lightly smacked his shoulder. "Ivashkov, you're making it hard for the maids to clean later. Maybe you should put your feet down."

Adrian rolled his eyes, but obliged. I could feel Dimitri watching us very intently, even though I wasn't looking at him.

It was time to see how jealous he could get. I curled up closer to Adrian, leaning my head on his shoulder. "I'm glad we're finally back in. It was really cold outside, even if I was on fire while skiing."

"Rose, you're _always_ on fire," Adrian said, wrapping his arm around my shoulder and bringing me closer to him.

Luc made a gagging sound. "If you're going to start cuddling up and be all cute in front of us, kindly do your PDA in private."

"I second that," Christian muttered. "Last thing I want to see is Hathaway and Ivashkov getting it on here."

"Hey, I bet we'd be nothing compared to what you and Lissa do," I shot back. "And I have to experience it secondhand through the bond!"

"Can we not discuss our sex lives while we're in public?"Lissa asked crossly, lightly smacking Christian's hand. His pale blue eyes softened as he looked down at her. "It's not very classy, and I'm not sure no one wants to hear the rated R details."

Dimitri looked between me and Adrian, and something in his eyes hardened. I slipped into Lissa's mind and saw that his aura was completely ringed in dark green. Since Lissa was sitting closer to him, I could see that his fists were clenched and he seemed to be trying to control his breathing.

I hadn't seen that reaction coming, and pursed my mouth for a moment. Was he seriously that jealous that I was flirting with Adrian?

"Are you two together now?" Dimitri asked me, looking pointedly at Adrian's arm around my shoulder.

I'd wanted him to be jealous, but I was a bit taken aback by how jealous he seemed – both in his aura, and his physical reaction. Tasha narrowed her eyes when she saw her lover get upset.

Several biting retorts were on the tip of my tongue, but I suddenly had an excellent reply. "What Adrian and I do is none of your business, Guardian Belikov," I said sweetly, with a cool smile.

_Nice one, Rose_, Lissa said to me, and my smile grew wider. _But I think you've gotten him to be more jealous than either of us expected._

Dimitri raised his eyebrow at me, and I could tell despite his now-passive exterior, he was taken aback by my use of his words from so long ago thrown back at him. "As your former mentor, your business is my business."

"Way to show it, after seven years of no contact," I retorted. "And I'm a grownup now, not a reckless novice."

Dimitri glared at me for a moment, and I was shocked by how he'd let his emotions slip. Realizing his mistake, he cleared his face of emotion and said in a very low voice, "You weren't just a reckless novice, Rose."

I stared at him, and my heart raced even though Adrian's arm was still around me. I looked down at the floor for a moment, scolding myself, and turned my attention back to Adrian. "Is there a hot tub around here? My muscles are really starting to ache now." It was true – skiing for several hours straight when I hadn't skied in years was tiring. The last time I'd gone skiing was nearly eight years ago, when St. Vlad's had come to this same ski lodge after several Moroi killings.

"There's a hot tub in my suite," Adrian said and winked at me. "I could always give you a massage _all over_." He said this very suggestively, and I smirked.

"If you really are together, I'd rather that you not talk so much about it," Tasha said tartly, taking Dimitri's hand and kissing it. Her tone implied that we were being immature, teenagers in love. I suspected she doubted we were really together.

To my surprise, I saw Dimitri flinch at her touch. He scooted a little away from her, and her blue eyes were filled with hurt. _Were they having married couple issues?_ I wondered. I also wondered if they really were married, since I hadn't seen rings – even engagement rings – on any of their hands. And something about the uneasy way Dimitri acted around Tasha wasn't making sense. Not to mention if they were married, I was sure Tasha would be flaunting the fact around me.

I stretched and Adrian got up, pulling me to my feet. "Let's get clean and relax before we come down for dinner," he said, addressing everyone around us.

We went up to our suites in the elevator, but as I turned to go with Lissa and Luc, I saw Dimitri staring at me, with a haunted look in his dark eyes. His gaze lingered on me for a moment longer, which made my heart race faster, before he turned away and went with Tasha.

* * *

**Author's note**: Hi everyone! Sorry I haven't updated in about a month, but I've had a somewhat bad case of writer's block with this story . Writer's block always seems to hit me whenever I write a long story now (anyone have tips for writer's block?). This chapter is somewhat of a filler (in my opinion) but now you can see that Dimitri isn't as impassive as you may think, especially since he sees Rose and Adrian "together." As always, suggestions/reviews are always appreciated! :) Hopefully I can finally get back to writing this story again. Happy reading~


	5. Apologies and Roses

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Vampire Academy.

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Ch. 5 Apologies and Roses

I lay my head on the edge of the bathtub and sighed loudly. I had pretended to be confident and flirtatious with Adrian, but I wasn't as great as I looked. I was a mess. A big, fucked up mess.

I shook my head to clear the negative thoughts and dunked my head under the scented water to wash out the shampoo. _You're going to focus on just flirting with Adrian_, I reminded myself. _You're not going to get into anything serious with anyone. Don't show anyone what's really in your heart_.

I finally rinsed out all of the shampoo in my hair and stepped out of the bath. I padded out and Lissa walked into the bathroom and shut the door. "Dress for a party!" she called out.

Ugh. What was with royals and parties? I liked parties as much as the next girl –or woman, since I'm in my twenties after all – but royals seemed to hold parties whenever there was a huge get-together.

I rummaged through my limited luggage. I'd brought a few dresses along, but none of them would really be able to match up to what royals would wear. Besides, I'd be mingling mostly with the other guardians in attendance. I picked up a white strapless cocktail dress edged in black and slid it on.

I looked at myself in the full-length mirror and smiled. I still looked as beautiful and hot as ever, even at the age of twenty-four. It was vain, but I felt comforted knowing that I still looked hot.

I was brushing my hair in front of the mirror when Lissa came out in a cream white full-length dress with shoulder sleeves. The skirt was embellished with dozens of silver crystals, which shimmered in the light.

I felt underdressed compared with her, but that was just how it would be. She would be the beautiful, dressed-up princess at royal functions while I would be the silent guardian always at her side.

"You look nice," she said with a smile, coming over to join me by the mirror.

"Not as half as nice as you do," I said, gesturing to her dress.

She smiled at that, and then frowned. "I heard that most of the royal council will be here at the dinner, so I need to be ready."

Although Lissa was being denied her family's spot on the council, a few of the more liberal members were arguing that she should be given her spot. If Lissa could finally take her place, she could fight for important issues like Moroi being able to go out and fight the Strigoi. Since there would be important royals and council members at the lodge tonight, it was important that she make a good impression on everyone.

I put my arm around her shoulder. "You'll do great. You'll impress all those stuck-up royal snobs and get your council spot before you know it."

"I hope I do," she said, sounding wistful. "I'll never get it until I marry Christian."

"Hey, you're practically engaged to be engaged," I reminded her. "Don't worry so much. Someday soon, you'll be on that council and decide the future of the Moroi world."

We looked at our reflections in the mirror silently for a moment. Lissa sighed. "I should probably get my hair done so I'll look nice and professional at the dinner."

I waved goodbye to her and flopped down on our bed, heedless of my pretty dress. I closed my eyes and let my mind drift.

I thought back to seven years ago, when Dimitri had caught me half-dressed with Jesse Zeklos in an empty lounge.

"_Do you know the rules about male and female interactions around here?" Dimitri demanded, glaring at Jesse._

_Jesse looked terrified but muttered, "Yes sir."_

"_Then I suggest you get out of here as fast as you can before I turn you over to someone who will punish you accordingly. If I ever see you like again this again – " Dimitri pointed to me, a dangerous note in his voice – "I will be on the one to punish you. And it will hurt. A lot. Do you understand?"_

_Jesse's eyes were wide with fear. "Yes, sir!"_

"_Then go," Dimitri snapped, finally releasing him and Jesse quickly exited the lounge. Dimitri turned to me, and there was a dark, angry look in his eyes. I got the message, but then…something changed._

_Dimitri's eyes were on me, and it looked like he was staring at me. I hadn't been sure, but he was looking at my face and my body. I'd only been in jeans and a bra, and I had started blushing at the look in his dark eyes. I had wondered how it would feel for Dimitri – someone full of dedication and intensity – to touch me. _

"_You see something you like?" I'd asked, covering up my feelings with attitude._

"_Get dressed," he said, his eyes hardening and losing that bit of emotion._

A knock on the door startled me out of my flashback. I groaned in protest and forced myself up from my lounging position on the bed. Couldn't Luc have just used his keycard to come in? "What is it?" I yelled.

"It's me," a voice with a Russian accent replied.

I froze and stared at the door. Anger, confusion, and longing flooded through me. There was no fucking way that Dimitri had knocked on my door. Was I dreaming? I pinched myself in the arm and winced a little. Nope, I was awake.

"What the hell do you want?" I shouted at the door, forcing my feelings of longing back and letting my anger take over. _Adrian, Adrian_, I chanted over and over in my head. "You and I have nothing to say to each other. We're only here because of our charges, and we'll only behave civilly towards each other." Actually, I was being far from civil with my fake relationship with Adrian, but who cared about technicalities?

"I just wanted to talk for a few minutes. It'll only take up a few minutes of your time," Dimitri pleaded.

I rolled my eyes and stomped my way to the door. "You're only getting five minutes at most, and it's out you go," I muttered, unbolting the door and swinging it open.

My breath caught at the sight of him. He was wearing a simple V-neck that revealed some of his lightly tanned skin and clung to his well-muscled body, and loose running sweats. He was holding a small bouquet of red roses that were as dark as wine.

His eyes widened at me, and I looked down at myself. "You see something you like?" I blurted out without thinking, and immediately scolded myself. Stop talking to him like he's still your mentor!

"You look beautiful," he said, sounding almost shy. My cocktail dress admittedly did pretty good on me.

"Thanks," I muttered, gesturing him in and shutting the door behind us. "Are those roses for Tasha?" Her name burned like acid on my lips.

"No, they're for you," Dimitri answered, offering the roses to me.

I gasped. "For me?" I couldn't help but take the bouquet when he placed in my arms. I pressed my nose against the roses, inhaling the sweet, delicate fragrance. I had never really liked roses because of my name, but for some reason, this didn't bother me. It was a sweet, almost romantic gesture.

"Thank you," I murmured, even though I felt vaguely uneasy. He shouldn't have given roses to me – his ex "friends with benefits." I led the way to the couches and sat down with the bouquet in my lap. "Why did you come to talk to me?"

Dimitri met my gaze, and for a moment, I saw a hint of intense emotion in his dark eyes. Then it vanished and there was that poker face he wore so well. I wished I knew what he was thinking.

He cleared his throat and said, "When I left you seven years ago…I left you without much warning and very coldly. I didn't think about what my absence would do to you afterwards." He looked down at his hands, a rueful expression on his face, before he looked back at me. "I know what nothing I do now will ever make up for the sadness and heartbreak I've caused you, but I want to try. Rose, I'm sorry for leaving you so abruptly all those years ago. I don't blame you for all the things you said to me when I left you."

I looked into Dimitri's face, wondering if this was some kind of joke. Had someone bribed him into apologizing to me? But I saw nothing but sincerity and pain in his dark eyes. _Why would he feel pain?_ I wondered, but immediately pushed the thought out of my head.

Still…I couldn't just forgive him right away. Yes, it was certainly a step in the right direction and I wasn't as disdainful of him as I had been earlier in the day. But how could I entirely forgive him for leaving me so swiftly? How could I forgive the fact he had turned his back on the love that we had once shared? Sometimes I was still haunted by the future we might've had together if he hadn't left.

I finally looked up at him, making sure to keep my emotions off my face. I doubted I could do it as well as he could, but I couldn't let him guess what I was thinking. "Dimitri, thank you for apologizing," I said formally. "All these years, I have been very angry and resentful over how you could leave me so quickly for Tasha. I doubt I will be able to truly forgive and forget, but this is a step in the right direction. Now that time has passed and eased the wound a little, I see that it must've been the best choice for you to take Tasha's offer. You get to guard a good friend of yours, and to marry and have a family."

A shadow crossed Dimitri's face at my last words. "I haven't married her, Roza." I flinched a little at his old nickname for me, but he didn't notice and continued, "And I certainly haven't had a family with her. I'm not sure if I'm ready to marry her, even though we've been together for these years."

Joy filled my entire heart, and I had to fight to keep it down. I almost ruined my poker face for a moment. He _isn't married to Tasha, and he doesn't feel ready to marry her! _Then I thought more closely about his words. _But if he's been with her for seven years, why hasn't he married her or feel ready to? He did leave _me_ for _her. Bitterness replaced my joy.

I cleared my throat and said, "Well, your private life with Tasha is certainly none of my business. I hope we can be friends – or at least acquaintances. You won't know how much your apology means to me, even though you must excuse me for not being able to forgive." Where are all these formal words coming from?

Dimitri nodded, his eyes distant, but then asked, "Are you dating Adrian Ivashkov?"

I stared incredulously at him. He'd already asked me that earlier in the lobby. Did he really think I was going to tell him that? Just because we were friends didn't mean I was going to blab the private details of my life to him! Especially considering he was my former mentor and my ex-lover. "Dimitri, that's really none of your business," I said as evenly as possible, trying to keep down my temper, but I was really starting to boil over. _Is he that determined to ruin our new friendship or whatever the fuck this is? _

"You didn't answer the first time I asked," he said lightly, but stood up.

I smiled pleasantly, but my temper was starting to show its ugly head. "You don't tell me about your love life with Tasha, and I won't tell you about my love life."

Dimitri opened his mouth to respond, but was cut off by a ringtone. He picked up his phone and answered. "Hello?"

A female voice that I instantly recognized whispered breathily, "Where are you, Dimka? I miss you."

_That fucking bitch_, I thought furiously, clenching my fists.

"I'm on my way up," he answered, neatly sidestepping her question. "I'll be in soon."

"Come back quickly," she breathed before hanging up.

"Duty calls," he murmured, walking to the door. I left the bouquet on the couch and trailed behind him. To my surprise, he took my hand and kissed it. "I'll see you later, Rose."

I shut the door behind him and sank to the floor, rubbing the spot on my hand where he'd kissed it. The feel of his lips on my skin…it was the same as it had felt seven years ago. In that brief moment, I'd forgotten everything but just Dimitri's touch, even though it had been on my hand instead of my lips…

_Stop it, Rose. Forget about your lingering feelings for Dimitri and move on with Adrian_, I scolded myself. _Even if it's not a permanent relationship_.

* * *

So yeah, I changed the rating from T to M for...reasons. You'll see soon. As always, reviews and suggestions are always appreciated ;D Enjoy!


	6. A Spark

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Vampire Academy.

* * *

Ch. 6 A Spark

Dimitri POV

Tasha was waiting for me, dressed in a low-cut ice blue evening gown, in her bed when I finally returned to our room.

"What took you so long, Dimka?" she asked petulantly, pouting.

I sighed and lay down on the couch. "Sorry. Had to take care of some business."

"Does that business involve Rose?"

I crossed my arms over my chest, feeling strangely defensive. "So what if it was?"

"I told you not to talk to her!" Tasha yelled, stalking over to me, her blue eyes full of anger. "She's your ex-girlfriend, and I'm your girlfriend. What reason would you have to talk to her? Or was it because she invited you alone to her room-"

"It was nothing like that," I said sternly. "I really wish you wouldn't jump to conclusions so quickly."

"But I knew she loved you. Maybe she wants you back," Tasha said, her voice becoming quieter. Her mouth trembled, and I could see how upset she was.

I rubbed my forehead. _If she does, she's doing a bad job of showing it_. To be honest…ever since I had seen her, I was starting to wonder why I had left my Roza for Tasha. Tasha was a beautiful, strong fighter…but she wasn't Rose.

An image of Rose's beautiful face flashed into my mind. _If Rose wanted me back…_ I didn't dare finish my sentence. But I was starting to see that perhaps Tasha and I weren't meant to be after all.

"I don't know if that's what she wants or not," I said neutrally.

Tasha slid her arms around me and nuzzled into my neck. "Forget her," she breathed into my ear. "Just think about the future we'll have together. Forget the past."

Rose and my doubts about Tasha gradually faded from my mind. She kissed my neck before moving her lips up against mine. This kissing felt forced and mechanical. Actually, anything romantic I did with Tasha – from kissing to sex – felt strange, like I really didn't want to do it. My concerns vanished as Tasha pulled me closer to her, a low groan escaping her. "What do you want to do?" I asked, letting my hand trail down her neck and to her hips. Although it was my own hand moving, I felt oddly disconnected from my actions.

"I can think of something we can do to forget everything," she whispered, leaning in and sucking on my ear.

I tilted my head in confusion at her, but she pulled down the strap of her evening gown, her eyes hot on mine.

I started to push her towards the bed, lust filling my whole body. A part of me tried to fight the desire, shouting, _Stop! You don't want this. Don't do it!_

I ignored it as Tasha pushed my shirt up and I fell on top of her against the bed.

"Make love to me," she whispered as she trailed kisses up my neck and pulled my shirt off. I pushed down her strap even further, covering her skin with kisses.

* * *

Rose POV

I remembered I needed to ask Adrian about auras. I checked the time, and it had been half an hour since Lissa had left. I left a quick scribbled note for her on the bed – I doubted she'd be able to check her texts while having her hair done – and hurried down the hall to Adrian's suite.

Thomas opened the door and gestured me in. "He just got out of the shower," he said. "I'll give you two some privacy."

"Thanks, Thomas," I said as he shut the door behind him.

Adrian came out in his slacks and undershirt. He raised an eyebrow at me. "Well, well, little dhampir. I never thought I'd see the day where you would come to my private room to talk to me. Maybe I can finally die of happiness."

I rolled my eyes. "Charming, Ivashkov."

"I live to serve," he said, pulling on a green silk shirt that perfectly matched his eyes before putting on a vest. He turned to face me, and I was struck by how good-looking he was. His dark hair was still wet from the shower, and his green eyes were pretty stunning.

Adrian raised his eyebrow at me – why could everyone do it but me? – and smirked. "Hey, try not to faint at the sight of my good looks, okay? I don't think I know how to do CPR."

"That's not what I was thinking," I shot back, smoothing down the skirt of my cocktail dress. "I wanted to talk to you about auras."

Adrian's amused expression turned solemn. "Ah, that's right." I paced up and down in front of him.

"What exactly did you see today with Belikov?" he asked, his voice gentle.

I described how I'd slipped into Lissa's head earlier out on the slopes and how Dimitri's aura had looked. There had been dark green – a definite sign of jealousy – around his aura but had vanished when a transparent color covered it.

Adrian ran his hands through his hair in agitation. "That seems to match up exactly with what I saw as well."

"But what does it mean? Did he just wipe his aura clean of jealousy?" I wondered aloud.

Adrian tapped his chin thoughtfully. "I've seen auras for a long time so as far as I know, it's not possible to cover up feelings in an aura. An aura can't suddenly change colors – and emotions. It's possible to physically hide your emotions, like with a poker face, but the aura will always reflect what you're truly feeling. And Belikov in particular doesn't do magic, even if every woman thinks that everything he does is magic."

I ignored his jibe about Dimitri. "So it shouldn't be possible for anyone to cover up their aura or just have it change colors?"

Adrian frowned. "In theory, it might be possible for someone to alter the aura to a color that is a similar emotion. But to completely wipe out the emotion? That seems impossible, but that's what happened with our Russian friend. That clear color that wiped all traces of jealousy from his aura…that's troubling, to put it mildly."

"More like creepy," I muttered, my thoughts churning with what I'd just learned. If the aura is supposed to reflect a person's true feelings, what does that mean?

"It takes time for emotions to gradually fade from an aura," Adrian added. "For example…well." He paused before going on. "You've been sad for the past seven years. There are times when your aura will lighten up, but the sadness doesn't completely go away. It's normal for some time – whether it's minutes or years – to pass for an emotion to go away. But it shouldn't be possible to change emotions so quickly. Never seen anything like it before."

I stopped my pacing. "Do you have any ideas what might be able to cause that abrupt shift in emotion we saw?"

Adrian shook his head. "Not really. Maybe if there was another spirit user, then we might have a lead. But there's no one but me and Lissa."

_That we know of_, I added silently but didn't say.

Adrian sighed. "I guess I don't really have any leads or hints for you, Rose. Sorry about that. I'll keep looking and keeping an eye on his aura…" He trailed off.

That made me feel bad. Although he liked me, he was willing to keep an eye on my ex-lover so that I'd be at ease about this strange aura thing. I hugged him. Adrian was a much better person than anyone would've given him credit for. "Thanks," I breathed into his ear.

* * *

I trailed a few feet behind Lissa as we entered an enormous banquet hall. Like so many places here, this room was recognizable from my first trip here – the carpet, the chairs, the paintings of Moroi royalty…

Lissa strode into the room confidently, and soon many royals were by her side chatting with her. Christian, Adrian, and Tasha joined her.

The rest of us – me, Eddie, Luc, Thomas, and Dimitri – made ourselves scarce near one of the entrances. As guardians, most of us wouldn't be expected to chat and mingle with the royal Moroi. We were just expected to stay in the room with our charges and be on guard. Strigoi attacks on highly secured areas were rare but not unheard of, which was why we guardians were still on duty.

To my discomfort, I was standing near Dimitri. My mouth almost watered when I saw him. God, he looked _amazing_ when he was dressed up instead of in his casual wear. Formal wear made him look more polished and stylish than he usually did. I scolded myself for caring.

The other three were chatting among themselves about some guardian I didn't know at Court. Our fellow guardians were either standing along the wall or mingling with the crowd. We were unofficially on duty, which explained why most of us were dressed up.

Dimitri looked miserable about something, and I wondered what was bothering him_. Oh, Dimitri, I wish you didn't look so unhappy_, I thought. I wished I could do something to wipe the miserable –

I cut myself off at that. _You are over him. You are over Dimitri_.

I groaned and slammed my hand into the wall in frustration. I thought my self-control had grown, but it was slipping.

"What's wrong, Roza?"

_And even more proof of how much I've slipped_, I thought bitterly.

I turned around and put on a smile. "I'm fine, thanks for asking."

Dimitri opened his mouth, no doubt to say that I didn't seem fine, but Luc inadvertently came to my rescue. "Hey, Rose, do you want to tell Jasper and Helene what you did the first time you met me? They're some friends of mine I haven't seen in a long time."

I strolled to where he was standing with two guardians. They looked like they'd just graduated from school and newly assigned, which explained why they were staring at everything wide-eyed. "Hi, I'm Rose," I said, extending my hand.

"We've heard all about you," Helene said, her blue eyes wide.

"Hopefully it's nothing bad," I joked. "Do you really want to hear the story? It's not that interesting." The two young guardians nodded.

I launched into my story, explaining that Luc had been a recruit from a boarding school in France. "There are other schools for guardians and Moroi in other countries?" both guardians asked in unison.

I shrugged. "Apparently. I was shocked too, but there's a substantial amount of Moroi and dhampirs overseas." I continued with how I'd proceeded to nearly knock out Luc during our first meeting.

I watched Dimitri out of the corner of my eye. Instead of watching our surroundings or the exits, his dark eyes were on… me.

I felt a bit flustered under his gaze. Suddenly, he turned and appeared to walk in my direction but Tasha suddenly appeared, like she'd been watching and waiting. She narrowed her eyes at me, and I could almost read the message in her eyes. _Stay the hell away from my man_.

I glared back at her, hoping my eyes were conveying a message. _Try to make me._

"Dimka, can you get a few minutes off duty?" she asked in a very sweet voice. Bitch. Disguising the crazy, maniac bitch lurking under her pretty looks…

Dimitri looked extremely taken aback. _Good for him_, I thought. I couldn't seem to stop looking at him tonight, and we'd just promised to be friends… "Sorry, Tasha, you know how it's been lately," he answered, frowning at her. "With those recent Strigoi attacks, we have to be on high alert, even if we're in a highly secured location."

Tasha bit her lip, fluttering her eyelashes. "But we've barely spent time together," she breathed, "except for this afternoon…in _bed_." She turned her gaze on me, and I could see the smugness in her eyes.

I gasped. _That_ was just crossing the line. Being with her boyfriend/my ex-lover was one thing, but flaunting her sex life? Oh, bitch, you are so going down.

I excused myself from Liam and the others before storming over to Tasha and Dimitri. There was a resigned look in Dimitri's eyes, like he had expected this.

"What the _fuck_ do you think you're doing?" I snapped. Some of the Moroi royals nearby looked at me in shock at my cursing. Screw them. "Talking about your wonderful sex life in front of me is a bit low, don't you think?"

"Not my fault you have such good hearing," Tasha said coolly, remaining as icy as her blue eyes. "I never said you had to come over to-"

"Be quiet. I don't really care that much about what you and Dimitri do, but kindly refrain from talking about what you two do in bed when I'm nearby, thanks," I hissed before I stormed off.

* * *

I pushed my way through the doors of the ballroom, breathing heavily. I hadn't felt this angry in a very long time. Hell, it had been a while since I'd lost control like that.

_What happened to controlling your temper?_ a voice taunted me.

I found a chair and flounced down on it. And to make matters worse, I'd lost my control over Dimitri. The man I'd loved before he left me for that ice princess bitch. Clearly, I was out of it. I was going to move on with Adrian – in a fake relationship – and leave Dimitri behind. Once we left the ski lodge, I would forget him once and for all. Brooding over him for the past seven years hadn't done anything.

I closed my eyes and counted to ten, willing myself to calm down. I could feel Lissa's anxiety when she couldn't find me. _Rose, where are you? _she asked through the bond.

I just wanted a moment of peace and quiet. _Was it too much to ask?_ I quickly fired off a text to her before powering it off.

I sighed and closed my eyes again. _I'll go back inside in a few minutes_, I promised myself. I needed a serious break from all the drama that had taken place within one _day_. I thought coming here to the lodge would be restful. Instead, it dredged up old memories with _him_ I preferred to forget and I had to face the icy bitch from hell. Ironically, Dimitri had been "with" Tasha at the time seven years ago when he was considering whether to take her offer to be her guardian or not.

I heard the door open but I kept my eyes closed. Maybe I was going to get scolded for napping on the job but since this was an unofficial duty…

"Roza?"

_Not again!_

I opened my eyes and saw Dimitri standing in front of me. His face was filled with concern, and I had to admit, it made my heart flutter even more than when he'd come to apologize. "Why are you out here? Are you okay?"

"You can stop pretending to care," I murmured, half to myself. A look crossed his face that showed me he had indeed heard. _Aren't you supposed to be friends?_ I asked myself, and checked myself.

"But I do care," he said softly, brushing some of his hair away from his face so he could look at me more closely. "I care much more than you seem to think." There was a conflict in his eyes I couldn't understand.

I smoothed the skirt of my dress over my knees. "Tasha's being such a bitch." The words slipped out before I could think of holding in my bitterness.

A strange look crossed Dimitri's face as he rubbed the silver watch on his wrist. "I know. She has never acted like that before when any other woman did look at me."

"That's because those women weren't me. They never shared a past with you."

He sighed. "Regardless, it was inexcusable of her to act so angrily towards you. And I'm pretty sure she said that to provoke you."

"Good to know you know that," I grumbled.

He reached his hand out for a moment before hesitating and letting it fall back to his side. I stared, my eyes wide. Had he wanted to touch me?

"Of course I know that," he said. "You would never have acted like that without reason."

I sighed, and looked away from him. "What are you doing here? I just wanted a break from everything."

When I turned to look at him, a wry smile was on his lips. "Without asking permission. Well I'm on break too."

"For like two minutes."

He laughed, and the rich, warm sound made me tingle all over. He took my hand and pulled me up from my chair. My skin instantly felt much warmer than it had just a second ago. He held my hand for a moment too long before letting go, and our gaze met.

There was a look in his eyes that I had seen once, long ago. I struggled to place it, but I could only vaguely remember that it had been before he had admitted he loved me. I swallowed, dimly aware of the thick tension between us and how we were standing a bit too close to each other. _Dimitri, I love you_, I whispered in my head. My feelings for him hadn't gone away after all…

"Come on, let's go back in," he said at last, extending his arm to me. I hesitantly took it, and I could feel how warm his skin was. "They'll be missing us."

"Isn't Tasha going to be pissed when she sees us, even though we're just friends?" I asked.

A dark look shone in Dimitri's eyes as we walked towards the door. "To hell with what she thinks of us."

* * *

**Author's note**: Dundundun. Some of you may be mad about the little bit at the end from Dimitri's POV, but I did that for a reason. You can see that he's not completely himself and he feels "forced" (and some readers are on the right track about what's going on with Dimitri). Hope you'll still enjoy this chapter besides that bit (even though quite a bit is filler, in my humble opinion), and reviews/suggestions will be appreciated :D


	7. A Moment in Time

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Vampire Academy.

* * *

Ch. 7 A Moment in Time

A few days had passed since that extremely long first day at the lodge. I had noticed Dimitri looking at me a few times when we were together, but I couldn't look back at him.

I knew I had to face the hard truth – to some small degree, I still loved Dimitri. That night when he'd come out after me during the royal banquet…it had caused a spark. A spark that had caused me to realize I still loved him. I wasn't clinging to my feelings from the past – I was still in love with him.

But I was going to ignore it. He was with Tasha, and someday, they would probably get married, despite his protests to the contrary. I was better off moving on with Adrian as my fake boyfriend. In fact, I'd been trying to convince myself – not to mention Lissa – I was better off that way, but I wasn't sure who didn't believe me more: Lissa or myself.

"You're not just going to get over the big love of your life so fast," she said kindly to me, seeing my inner turmoil. "And no one, even a cute fake boyfriend like Adrian, can make you get over him so fast."

I scowled. "It would be healthier, for sure."

"But it's not. Maybe if you'd been dating some cute guy, then you'd be okay. You'd have bounced back by now. But Dimitri is a whole different story. He was – and is – the love of your life. He ditched you for a bitchy ice princess. That kind of thing is sure to leave you altered."

I groaned and fell down on the bed. The sympathy coming through the bond from her made it almost worse, even though I knew it was because she cared. Still, I didn't really want to stick around for psychotherapy with my best friend. If she wasn't the Dragomir princess, I was sure she could have a great career as a therapist or counselor. "Gotta go, Liss. I'm meeting up with Adrian in a café."

"Fine," Lissa grumbled, fluffing her blond hair before standing. "But this conversation isn't over!"

* * *

I went downstairs and looked for the café Adrian had told me to meet me at. I saw him waving at me from a table for two, and I walked over to him. His green eyes widened when he saw me. "You look great, little dhampir."

I was wearing a red lace dress and a white cardigan over that. For some reason, the ski resort wanted everyone to dress "nicely" if we weren't in places like the spa or gym, so we had to dress up a little. So much for chilling in sweats for us. "Thanks," I said and seated myself across from him.

I ordered a hot chocolate before settling in comfortably. "So why'd you call me down here?" I asked.

"I just wanted to see how you're doing," Adrian said, sipping something that looked suspiciously like alcohol. I didn't scold him though. He had been laying off some of his drinking – despite the many alcoholic beverages the lodge offered – and I mostly wanted him to stop his smoking. "Your aura's been a little weird after that royal party, and we haven't gotten a chance to talk lately."

The waiter came by with my hot chocolate, and I took a good sip before responding. "What can I say? The night of the party, Dimitri came out after me to see how I was doing." I rubbed my head wearily. "It's conflicting, coming from a guy who's supposedly committed to his girlfriend."

"How is it conflicting?" Adrian asked, tilting his head to the side.

I shook my head and sighed. "Yesterday I was standing close to him – not on purpose – when we were waiting in line to go snowboarding. He moved away from me and said, 'You shouldn't be so close to me, Rose. I hope you're not getting the wrong message.'"

Adrian raised his eyebrow at that. "That is pretty conflicting."

"Why would he act like he cares about me, but a few days later, he does a complete personality change?" I asked in frustration. "Even _Lissa_ couldn't figure it out, and she's great at reading people!"

Adrian shrugged and sipped from his glass. "If advice from a drunk royal party boy is worth anything, I would advise you to stay away from him."

I bristled a little at his words, even though I didn't get why. "Why?"

He sighed and shot me a long even look. "You're not even close to halfway healing from him, Rose." It was a rare use of my real name, and I stared before he continued. "It's just better if you try to move on from him completely. And that means staying away from him at all costs, no matter what."

"Easier said than done if he wasn't Tasha's guardian," I said bitterly, finishing off my hot chocolate. "_And_ if said guardian would stay away from me."

Adrian took my hand, and my skin tingled a little at the warmth. "You know how I feel about you…but I'm going to say it so you'll know. I wish you could truly be my girlfriend, without all this pretending. And this is just making things hard for me. I really wish you could get over Dimitri soon, so we could be together."

I stared at him. My mind was in complete chaos. I didn't even know how to respond. "Adrian…"

"I know it'll take more time for you to get over him. He was the love of your life." Adrian sounded uncharacteristically bitter on his last sentence, and a strange look passed over his face for a moment. "I know I'll probably never be more than your second choice, and you'll probably never love me the same way I love you…but I just want you to think about for a while. I'm not asking you to choose me right away. Just give it some thought, okay?"

I nodded weakly, unsure of what else to do. He downed his glass and stood up, a devilish smile appearing on his face. "Gotta go, little dhampir. See you in a few hours."

I groaned. We would be attending another banquet tonight – this time, it would be hosted by some of the most prominent Ozeras. He waved to me as he strolled off, and I slumped down in my seat.

Great. Now Adrian Ivashkov wanted me to be his _girlfriend_. It wasn't that I didn't like being with him…but it would be _really_ unfair of me to date him, knowing that he was in love with me. Or thought he was, anyway. After Dimitri, everyone I dated would be second-best at most. I didn't know what I could do to permanently get over him, but I knew dating Adrian – for real – isn't an option. Sure, he's cute, charming, and funny, but I just saw him as a friend.

I sighed and got up after paying for my hot chocolate. Time to clear my mind through some physical exercise.

* * *

After changing out of my dressy clothes, I was heading down the stairs to the basement level – for the gym.

It was a gleaming brand-new facility, with state-of-the-art equipment. It was a shame that they didn't put it on a higher level, especially since the lodge was pretty big, but I guessed that not many Moroi frequented the gym.

I scanned the room before finding a treadmill with no one on it. I got on, plugged in my iPod, and started to run.

I liked exercising. It was one of the few times where I didn't have to devote most of my brainpower to…well, a certain person. I had to focus my mind on nothing but the physical exertion.

I heard someone take the treadmill next to me, but ignored them and kept running. My heart rate was up, and a fine sheen of sweat covered my skin.

Eventually, I finished and decided to practice my sparring. I crossed the gym to the area reserved for sparring, and began some warm-up stretches.

Once I finished, I moved on to the dummies and yanked out my silver stake. I hadn't had to deal with many Strigoi attacks in the past few months, but it was good to stay prepared.

I heard footsteps behind me as I stabbed into the first dummy's chest. I yanked out my stake and kept going.

"Roza."

I froze as I was about to pull out my stake and completely lost my grip on it. I would know that voice anywhere. I cursed and yanked out the stake. "What are you doing here?"

"Coming to exercise, of course." He sounded pretty amused, but I kept refusing to look at him.

"Well, have fun doing…whatever. I was going to spar, but never mind." I turned to head for the punching bag, but he put his hand on my arm and I froze again at his touch. _Stop thinking about his touch_, I scolded, but I couldn't help myself. His skin was so warm and silky…

"Perhaps I could be your sparring partner."

I whipped my head around and glared at him. "You've got to be kidding me." I yanked my arm away from him like he'd burned me.

"I want to see if you remember any of the skills I taught you all those years ago. Surely you must have kept some of those skills, since you guard Vasilisa now."

Those sounded like fighting words, and I wondered if he'd said that on purpose. I whipped around again and stared him down. "It's on."

I yanked my dark hair into a ponytail so it wouldn't be falling into my face while we were fighting, and did some more warm-up exercises. It had been quite a while since I'd actually gone hand-to-hand with anyone.

We got onto the exercise mats and faced each other after putting on gloves so we wouldn't accidentally use our nails. The air felt almost electric between us. It didn't help that I couldn't keep my eyes off him. His dark hair had been trimmed so it was just a little past his ears, and his new hairstyle made his face easier to see. Not that it was really helping me with any type of coherent thought…

"We're only going hand to hand. We fight until one of us is too tired to get up from the mat. Start."

I sized him up. The last time we had fought each other was…well, right before the Strigoi attack. It had been part of our field experience. After a long, drawn out fight, I had finally managed to "stake" him.

I feinted to my right, but Dimitri had anticipated that and mirrored my movement. _How is it that he remembers how I move after seven years?_ I wondered, but dismissed the thought. I aimed my fist at his head and he ducked, but I then used my other hand and punched his stomach.

He flinched a little, but landed a blow on my shoulder. I lunged at him, and elbowed his side. He tried to hit my shoulder again, but I dodged out of range.

We continued to feint and try to land attacks on each other, but we remembered each other's moves. We were still very evenly matched, and I felt a faint sense of pride that I had managed to keep up even after years had passed.

Finally, Dimitri tried to pin me to the mat. I rolled away and punched his stomach. This time, he fought through the pain and pushed me to the ground. I was too exhausted to try to fight him and just lay on the mat.

"I won," he said, and there was a small glint in his dark eyes.

"Hey, I didn't do too badly," I pointed out, my chest heaving from the exertion we'd put ourselves through.

"True," he agreed, "but there'll always be room for improvement."

I groaned. "You and your Zen wisdom!"

He laughed – a full, joyous laugh, which left me momentarily stunned, even though I'd heard him laugh not so long ago. Then, something in his eyes shifted.

I was suddenly hyperaware of how close we were. He hadn't moved an inch since pinning me under him. There was almost no space between us at all. I gulped, aware of how fast my heart was pumping, and it wasn't from our sparring exercise. The air between us felt thicker than before, all-consuming.

Dimitri lowered his head closer to mine, and all of a sudden, I wanted to kiss him. Or I wanted him to kiss me. I wanted a kiss so bad that my entire body burned. I wished my arms were free so I could use them to pull him down to me for a long, deep kiss.

He leaned in even closer, and I could smell that wonderful aftershave he wore. I closed my eyes, ready to let him kiss me, but then he pulled away from me with a Russian swear word.

My eyes flew open, and I saw him rubbing his wrist. A silver wristwatch gleamed up at me. "I…This is wrong."

I blinked a few times to get my head back on straight. Then the reality of what had almost happened hit me. I had wanted my ex-boyfriend, who was with another woman, to kiss me. Sure, they weren't engaged or married…but nothing would change the fact he wasn't with me.

Mortified, I tried to get up, but his body was so heavy. "Let me up, Dimitri," I said.

He looked like he was struggling with something, but didn't appear to have heard me.

"Why did you just act like you want to kiss me? Have you forgotten the fact that you basically dumped me for her?" I snapped. I instantly wanted to scream at myself for yelling the first thing on my mind. _You're supposed to be working on being friends with him, not snapping at him about his love life! What am I doing?_

Dimitri's eyes were full of conflict. I didn't understand why he didn't simply get up and pretend that our almost kiss had never happened. Instead, he looked absolutely confused. "I…that's the thing, Roza. I…I'm not sure if I love Tasha."

Shock filled my whole body. I blinked a couple of times, and pinched myself to check if I was dreaming. Nope. I was awake. But this couldn't be happening.

"Dimitri. You're Tasha's boyfriend." The last two words burned my mouth like acid as I spoke. "Of course you love her. You're just a little confused since you-"

"No," Dimitri said quietly. "I don't love her. Roza, I…I love you."

My whole body went rigid at that. The sorrow that had lingered in my heart for the past years...it was suddenly gone, like I had never been heartbroken. The love of my life loved me back in return.

But then reality set in. I could never be his. Never again. Not after the callous way he had left me and broken my heart. And he was with Tasha. Several heated moments and our almost kiss wouldn't change my mind. I had to move on. Brooding on the past was seriously unhealthy. I would get over him.

As soon as I could convince myself of that.

"Well, that's too bad, because I don't love you. You're…you're a stranger now. Sometimes you act like a friend one moment, and the next moment you're an icy stranger I don't know." That last part was true. The man who had been so passionate and ready to lay down his life for Moroi at a moment's notice…he was gone. Yes, that part of him still existed – especially right now, in this particular moment – but I suspected being with Tasha had changed him in a way that he would never be able to undo. Not to mention how he seemed to have multiple personality disorder...

"Then why did you almost kiss me back?" he asked quietly.

I cursed myself, but said, "Physical responses mean nothing. You're my ex-boyfriend. Of course I would have some type of reaction."

"Not one like that," Dimitri said, leaning in closer. "You love me. You don't actually love Adrian Ivashkov."

I turned my head away, trying to ignore the truth of his words. "I don't love you. Stop saying it. You belong to Tasha. Someday you'll get engaged to her and marry her. You'll have kids. You can have a family." _You wouldn't be able to have a family if we were together_. His being with Tasha was a small blessing, not that I considered it to be one.

"Don't tell me how to live my life!" Dimitri shouted, and I stilled, shocked by his emotion. His face was full of...anger? Regret? I would always be surprised when he let down his guard and showed his emotions - I didn't think it was something I would be able to get completely used to. "Don't tell me who to love."

I slid out from under him and sprang to my feet. "Then don't tell me who I love or don't love. I'm going to be with Adrian for real, and no one will stop me."

I saw the wounded look on Dimitri's face, and I wanted to take back my words. But how could I, if I wanted to get over him and be able to sleep again at night without reminiscing about the past? It was a past that was long gone, and would never return, no matter how much I wanted it to.

I turned my back on him. "Find happiness with Tasha and try to forget me." I didn't want him to forget me, but I vowed that I wouldn't be what tore them apart – no matter how much I hated Tasha. "Goodbye, Dimitri. This will be the last time we talk like this again."

With that, I walked away from Dimitri.

* * *

Dimitri POV

I stared after Roza after she stormed out of the gym. I knew she loved me. I could see it in her eyes. She was trying to be stoic and not give in to her feelings…but I knew her better. I had known her very well seven years ago, and to a degree, I still did.

But I was hurt by her rejection of me. My heart ached. Did she want me to suffer as much as she had after I had left her? It sounded cruel, but I supposed I deserved it.

After sparring with her, my blurred memories of her had suddenly resurfaced. It was like just being so close with her had reignited my forgotten memories. I remembered every moment clearly – our first meeting, the first time I had really noticed her, the time I had almost made love to her under the lust spell…and of course, the cabin. That last memory had been buried for a long time.

I don't know when I exactly realized that I stopped loving Tasha – if I'd ever loved her at all. In the past few days since that first royal party, I thought about Roza. I tried to stay out of Tasha's way when I was on my break, preferring the solitude of our room to the masses of people in the lodge.

I had to get Rose back, no matter the cost. I would do anything to win her affections again. I had to help her realize how much she still loved me, even though I wasn't sure exactly what to do to win her affections. I did know what I had to do first – break up with Tasha.

Then I paused. I didn't think Tasha would let me go easily. She had been delighted when I'd taken her offer after the Strigoi attack on St. Vladimir's those years ago. A wry smile crossed my lips. With her paranoia and jealousy…no. I couldn't break up with her right away, and it wasn't so I could spare her feelings. It was to ensure she wouldn't try to stop me from winning Rose's heart.

_I'll get Roza to love me again_, I silently vowed. _And once I get her to soften to me a little, I will break up with Tasha. I've let my relationship with Tasha go on for too long when I was blinded by my "love."_ _I'll do whatever it takes to get Roza by my side once more._

* * *

**Author's note**: Sorry I haven't updated in so long! School + writer's block = no progress at all :( And I'm kind of stuck on where to go with the story from here, so suggestions will be _greatly_ appreciated (will love you forever if you can put some suggestions in!) Read/review, and enjoy!


	8. Presents and Snow Talks

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Vampire Academy.

* * *

Ch. 8 Presents and Snow Talks

I ran back up to my room and slammed the door behind me, breathing heavily. Dimitri had not just confessed his love for me. He couldn't have just tried to kiss me and confessed that he didn't love Tasha.

But all of that had happened. And now my mind was stuck on an endless replay of what had just happened, like my memory was on repeat. I had admitted to myself that I still loved him…but that didn't mean anything for our future. Our future would not exist.

_Stop it_, I scolded myself. _Stop thinking about it. Leave the past in the past. Forget him. He doesn't matter. _

My heart didn't want to listen. I'd repressed my feelings of loss and hurt over Dimitri for seven years, but everything over the past few days he'd done brought them all back. The confession…Old feelings I hadn't felt in years were starting to return. So much for the progress I'd made.

I closed my eyes and tried to think about Adrian. His face appeared in my thoughts, but was replaced by Dimitri's. Those dark eyes that looked like they could peer into my soul…

I groaned and headed into the bathroom to turn on the shower. There was absolutely no escaping Dimitri's confession. He couldn't take back his words and pretend he'd never said them, although I could almost imagine that happening. I kind of wished he would just ignore me instead of confessing that he loved me. I had to stay away from him, despite my own feelings towards him.

_And why would he think he loves you now?_ I asked myself. _If he had really loved you, he never would've left you in the first place. It must be temporary insanity. He probably just wants to chase the woman that he left for the hell of it. _

I could only imagine what Tasha would do if she found out that her boyfriend had confessed his love for me, the woman he had used to love. That would be a horrific situation. Tasha had already been cold enough to me when we'd arrived at the lodge. What would happen if she got wind of Dimitri's confession? I thanked my lucky stars that no one had been around to witness Dimitri's confession. That would've been fodder for Moroi/dhampir gossip – the guardian of one of the Ozeras confessing his love for the guardian of the Dragomir princess.

I traitorously wished that Dimitri would break up with Tasha and be with me. Years had passed since we'd been romantically together…but maybe… I cut myself off right there.

_You will not cause Dimitri and Tasha to break up_, I chanted over and over again in my head as I peeled off my clothes and got into the shower. _No matter what. Forget the confession happened and just stay friends with Dimitri. Don't let him get any closer than he already has. _

* * *

Dimitri POV

I paced my room in agitation. I had to win Rose over and make her realize she still loved me. Even if she denied it, I knew that deep down, she loved me. I guessed she was trying to figure out how to ignore it – and me – so she could move on.

I sighed. It would be a lot easier if I could get Vasilisa on my side, but she was fiercely protective of and loyal to Roza. I doubted I'd be able to get Vasilisa to help me unless I could prove to her that my feelings for Rose were genuine.

And there was the whole matter of courting Rose. I was still with Tasha, after all. I couldn't just proclaim my love for Rose for the whole world to see. I knew that Tasha would try to stop me because I was her boyfriend. Even if I did break up with her…I had a feeling she would beg and cry for me to stay with her. She would do everything in her power - an approach not unlike the one she used to get her point across about self-defense - to keep me with her.

So for now, I would have to appear that I still liked Tasha. I had a feeling that would make courting Rose all that more difficult. She wouldn't be receptive to me trying to win her over while I was still with Tasha. I had to find a way to show my cooling feelings toward Tasha in a way that wouldn't make her suspicious and in a way that would show Rose that my heart belonged to her.

I thought back to when I had shown up at Roza's room on the first day at the ski lodge to apologize with a bouquet of roses. She had appreciated the gesture and I supposed I would have romance her accordingly – in a romantic, thoughtful way.

Gifts alone would not win Rose over. I had to prove to her that I wasn't chasing her for some nefarious reason. She probably thought that I just wanted to get her into bed or I had a strange

I smiled to myself. _I think I know where to start on getting Rose to soften for me_. I doubted it would make her see her feelings for me, but it at least would be a start.

* * *

Rose POV

I was dreaming of running along a beach with crystal blue waves when a knock on the door woke me up.

I groaned and slowly pushed to my feet before looking over at the next bed where Liss slept. She was still sleeping and let out several loud deep breaths. I smiled. She could probably sleep through a stampede of elephants.

I stumbled to the door to find a teenaged Moroi boy holding an extremely large box – the kind that looked like a few laptops could fit in. "Delivery for Guardian Hathaway. That's you?"

"Yeah," I said, nodding, wondering why I would get a package at this hour of the night – or day, since it was afternoon for humans.

He handed it to me. "For you," he said, before turning and walking down the hallway.

I shut the door behind him and I took the package to the living room area before sitting on the sectional couch. I careful peeled open the tape on the box and gasped.

Inside the box was a bouquet of red roses, forget-me-notes, and red tulips. After pulling out the vase the flowers came in, I noticed a small box with a white card – and a red crystal rose – attached on top and lifted it out.

_I'm thinking about you._ ~ D

I closed my eyes but held the card to my chest. Of course. No one else would send me flowers – unless it was Adrian. The first time we'd come to the ski lodge, he'd sent me a huge delivery of numerous perfumes.

Then I noticed that the box was actually a box of Ferrero Rocher chocolates and couldn't help my excitement. I loved chocolate – and Ferrero Rocher was a really good (but expensive) brand.

It hit me that Dimitri was trying to court me and suddenly all my excitement was drained away. I sat down on the bed, staring at the card. Yes, it was a wonderful feeling for the love of my life to be paying attention to me. But just because I loved him didn't mean I had to act on my feelings. Especially while he remained with Tasha.

Three days had passed since Dimitri had confessed his feelings for me. I had unceremoniously avoided him whenever my group combined with him and Tasha. I often sulked to the corner or stood on the fringe of the group whenever they did activities. Interestingly, when I wasn't nearby, Dimitri wouldn't try to communicate with me whatsoever. He would go on staying by Tasha's side without even trying to look at me. What the hell was up with that? He was blowing hot and cold and I couldn't get a fix on what he was thinking.

If Dimitri loved me, he would dump Tasha in an instant. Unless he ever did, I wasn't sure if I could trust his motives.

I was really starting to wish I hadn't opened the box. I should've guessed that it would be Dimitri even before I opened it – who else would send me chocolates? Certainly not Mom, even though our relationship had improved a lot over the past years. Not to the point where I could confide in her about everything, but we did trust each other more.

I reminded myself of my last thoughts before I'd showered – that I wouldn't come in between Tasha and Dimitri, no matter the things Dimitri did to try to win me over.

I looked down at the box and ruefully thought about sending the flowers and chocolates back to Dimitri. It would've been better if I hadn't opened it at all. I reached out and snagged a chocolate from the box before going back to bed.

"He sent you a box of chocolates?" Lissa demanded, her green eyes wide.

I groaned. "Liss, it's nothing. I mean…he's just sending a bunch of mixed messages."

Lissa was really on a roll now. "That's _not_ nothing. Who sends a bunch of your favorite chocolates to you without intending something? Dimitri is definitely trying to win you back and he means it. Did he send you a card?"

I hesitated but the look in her eyes said, _If he did, I will search through your things until I find it_. I really wouldn't put it past her when she was set on finding it.

I groaned again and fished through my bag before throwing the card - along with the crystal - down on the table.

Lissa snatched it up and read it. "See? He's not chasing you for the fun of it. He's starting to realize the terrible mistake he made in choosing Tasha over you. Maybe…you could think of giving him a chance."

I gaped at her, unable to believe my ears. _Did she seriously just say what I thought she did?_ "Lissa! You've always been on my side! And now you're siding with him? You're such a traitor."

"I've mostly been angry at Tasha more than him," she explained, "although I've been mad at Dimitri too for ditching you. I know how much he hurt you and how heartbroken you've been…but maybe…you should consider a second chance."

I shook my head. "No way. He'd have to break up with Tasha for that to happen, and that's not likely to happen. He's so chivalrous that I can't imagine him breaking up with her for me."

"All or nothing?" Lissa asked with a sigh. "Well. There has to be something he can do to win you over."

"I seriously can't believe you're siding with him," I grumbled.

_You've tried to date plenty of guys after he left. It never worked out. Ever since coming here…I can see the feelings you still have for each other. You two are soulmates – your auras mirror each other. I think you're destined to be together. You've been unhappy for so long. He's the only one who makes your aura shine with happiness._

I shook my head and stood. "So not going to happen anytime soon. Yes, I still love Dimitri but I'm not doing anything about it. He's not single, and even if he was...It's better for us this way. And I refuse to meddle in his relationship with Tasha. I promised myself I wouldn't get in their way, and I won't. Not now, not ever." I walked off.

I had to admit, I felt betrayed that Lissa was siding with Dimitri. _What kind of a friend sided with her best friend's ex?_ Was the world turning upside down? If Christian had left her, I would've happily kicked his ass for her, not sided with him in trying to win her back.

When I came out of my daydream, I realized I was standing near the door and decided to go outside for a walk to clear my mind. Sure, I would probably freeze my ass off but at least I would be able to get my head on straight.

Someone opened the door for me and I strolled out into the snow. "Thanks," I said without looking up. _Wow, it's colder than I thought it would be_.

"My pleasure."

Startled, I looked away from the stunning view outside the lodge to see Dimitri. There was a gentle, amused look in his eyes. "You almost walked into the door, Roza."

"Don't call me Roza. And please don't send me anything – we're never going to be together again. Hell, I'm not even sure if we can just be friends."

That tender look vanished from his eyes. "Rose…what do I have to do to get you back? I'll do anything."

"Words are one thing, and actions are another. Actions speak louder than words, you know." I kept my back turned to him. Why was I even engaging in conversation with him? It was so much harder to talk to him after his confession. _Why did he have to complicate our friendship?_

Dimitri took my hands and I flinched, even though we were both wearing gloves, but I couldn't bring myself to pull away. I could almost feel the warmth of his skin through our gloves. "Roza. I heard you talking with Vasilisa. You said you loved me."

I flinched again, and it wasn't from the cold. Why did he have to hear that? "I don't plan on doing anything about it," I muttered, tugging my hand out of his. "Just because I might still have feelings for you doesn't mean I'll come running to you with open arms. Why should I? I'm doing great right now."_ Oh really now?_ a traitorous voice spoke up. I shut it up.

""I wouldn't ever lie to you about my feelings.," Dimitri murmured. I finally looked at him, my heart racing when I realized how close we were to each other. "Why would I lie about what I feel for you?"

I sighed impatiently before pacing a little farther away. "Just because we both have feelings for each other doesn't mean we can return to the past! Years have passed since we were last together. We've changed in the years that we spent away from each other. We're probably not the same people we met and fell in love with at the time."

"I know you're still the wonderful, beautiful woman that stands up for what she believes is right," Dimitri told me. "A little older, yes, but still as beautiful and amazing as before."

I shook my head, wondering how much flattery he was trying to use so I would return to him. "You... I don't know. You're not the same. Tasha changed you, and I'm not sure if it was for the better."

Dimitri's eyes flashed, but I wasn't sure what the emotion was. Would it ever be possible to understand what he was thinking? "Rose, you know I love and care about you. Why can't we leave why and how I left you in the past?" His voice sounded so miserable that I felt it tugging on my heart - and I knew he really did want to get back with me without some ulterior motive. It was just something I knew.

"If you really cared about me, you wouldn't have told me you loved me. It doesn't matter if you don't love Tasha – you're still her boyfriend. You're just making it harder for me to get over you. You're blowing hot and cold all over the place. One moment you love me, the next moment you don't even look at me," I muttered, turning away from him to walk forward into the snow. "I think it's better for us to have no contact. It's healthier, and we'll both recover."

Over the mountains, the sun was beginning to rise – it was almost nighttime for us. I focused solely on the golden light streaming through the trees and onto the snow. If I could focus on the stunning scenery around me, maybe I could forget that I was with Dimitri. And that we were both alone. I breathed in the fresh, mountain air. But no matter what I did, I couldn't forget where I was or who was standing near me.

I could feel Dimitri's commanding presence behind me. "There are reasons I can't break up with Tasha just yet. If I could, I would've done it so I could court you. As for the hot and cold…I don't know what's going on." His voice sounded a bit pinched. "I would break up with Tasha if I could."

I laughed harshly. "Really? Maybe you just want a steady relationship with her while having me as the other woman. I won't be the other woman. If you're going to court me, at least be single first. You can't truly love me if you still have a girlfriend."

Dimitri took my hand again and made me turn so I was facing him. The emotions in his eyes made my heart stop. "Roza. You are the only woman I've truly loved. The only one who knows so much about me without me having to say anything. I feel complete when I'm with you, and I've never felt that way around anyone else. We're parts of the same whole. I'll say this as many times as I need for you to believe me: I love you."

My breath caught at his words. Against what my brain was telling me, I stepped even closer to him. "I love you too," I whispered. What are you doing? Rose, you just told him you loved him!

A smile crossed Dimitri's face. "I've been waiting to hear that for days."

Before I could process what he was going to do, he leaned down and kissed me.

* * *

**Author's note**: So sorry I haven't updated in so long! I've been suffering from writer's block for a long time, which is why it's been forever since I've updated. Sorry if this chapter kinda sounds not in "synch" with the other chapters since it's been so long since I've written anything for this. Hoping I can (finally) start to write again. PLEASE SUBMIT IDEAS AND REVIEW :) I want to thank everyone who's still following this story even though it's been a long time since I've updated.


	9. Stolen

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Vampire Academy.

* * *

Ch. 9 Stolen

My brain went completely blank for a moment. Before I knew what I was doing…I kissed Dimitri back.

His lips were so soft against mine. Soft and gentle. I had almost forgotten how kissing him felt like, even in my dreams. I closed my eyes and his arms around my waist to hold me close to him. I felt so safe in his arms. Like nothing and no one could ever touch me.

I tentatively opened my mouth to let his tongue in and his tongue was soon eagerly probing my mouth. Our tongues met and I tilted my head back to give him more access. We just French kissed for several moments before Dimitri stopped and sucked on my bottom lip.

I whimpered a little at how aggressively he was sucking on it. He'd never done this when we were still "together" at St. Vladimir's, but I enjoyed it. His hands slid up to brush my hair away from my neck, leaving it exposed, and he stopped sucking on my lip to gently kiss my neck.

I tensed a little when he kissed my neck. My neck was one of my favorite spots to be kissed, and the way he was kissing it… If Dimitri wasn't holding me upright, I might've fallen to my knees in the snow. He moved his lips back up to my own and kissed me again.

The best part about this? I wasn't thinking at all. I was floating on air, and it was like the golden bliss from a Moroi bite...except a hundred times better.

Then reality hit me, and it was like slap to the face. _I was kissing another woman's boyfriend._ Yes, he'd told me a million times that he didn't love Tasha…but it didn't change the fact that he was basically cheating on her just by having feelings for me. Sure, we weren't in bed – yet. But this wasn't the right thing to do.

I immediately stepped back from Dimitri, my heart pounding. He looked at me, puzzled. "What's wrong?"

"What do you mean what's wrong?" I demanded. "You…I…" I struggled to find words to express my dismay. "You kissed me! You're basically cheating on Tasha. It doesn't matter that you don't love her, and that you love me. Just because you said you love me doesn't change anything! You don't really love me unless you're going to prove it."

"If I broke up with Tasha, would that be enough? Would you want me again?" he asked, his voice soft with emotion.

I shook my head, backing even further away from him. "No! Whatever we once had is gone. Nothing any of us can do will ever bring it back. It's like I said before – it would be easier for both of us to just stay away from each other and to let the heartbreak heal."

Dimitri's voice was husky when he spoke again. "I won't give up. I'll do whatever it takes to get you to be mine again, Roza. I won't let anyone get in our way."

I stared at him, shock filling me at his words…and then a little bit of happiness. _Perhaps only time will convince him. _Somehow, deep in my heart, I knew he wouldn't give up so easily. _Maybe he is serious about getting me back…_

He walked towards me, and I didn't feel the urge to step back. I shivered as he leaned down to me and kissed my cheek.

He leaned in close and whispered, "I won't give up until you are mine again."

I watched him walk away, and had a feeling that he really would follow through on his promise. I didn't know if I should feel terrified...or excited.

* * *

"Really, Liss? Since when were we going to a hot tub again?" I complained as Lissa was throwing things out of her suitcase.

"Since Adrian 'convinced' some people to let us in," she said. Her tone conveyed such disapproval in the word "convinced" that I couldn't help but laugh. It was also a synonym – at least for us – for compulsion (one of spirit's great abilities). "And it's not a hot tub, it's that private access pool Adrian took us to last time."

"Not like you've not used compulsion," I teased, but then got serious. "I really don't want to go to the pool."

Lissa pulled a blue bikini out of her suitcase and headed into the bathroom. "Why not? It'll be fun. We'll have a blast."

_A blast out of my universe, you mean_, I thought darkly, thinking of Dimitri's kiss. I put my hand to my lips, recalling the sweetness of his lips on mine before dropping my hand. "I'm sure just Luc protecting you will be fine."

Lissa came out of the bathroom and shot me a curious look. "What's going on? Usually you'd be all for a pool party. Instead you're just…I don't know. Shying away."

I hesitated. _Should I tell her about my kiss?_ For the past day, I'd thought of nothing else but Dimitri's kiss. I'd tried to avoid Dimitri whenever possible (which I'd been pretty successful with), and was deeply relieved that he hadn't tried to find me.

"Spill," Lissa ordered. Man, it was hard having a psychic best friend – even if she couldn't actually read my mind the way I could with her. Twenty years of being best friends did that to someone.

"Dimitri kissed me, and told me he wouldn't give up on me," I blurted out.

Lissa's jaw dropped. Her expression was so hilarious I might've laughed if the cause wasn't my revelation. "He…WHAT?"

"He kissed me," I repeated, wondering what was up with her reaction.

_!_ was all that was coming through the bond for a moment before she collected herself. _OH MY GOD! That is so….romantic! _

Now it was my turn for my jaw to drop. "Lissa! He's with Tasha! Even if he wasn't with her, I can't be with Dimitri again." His name tingled on my tongue as I spoke. "Never. I won't let myself get hurt by him again."

"I think he's sincere," Lissa mused. "I've seen his aura. I don't see anything in it that indicates he's lying. I still think he's an asshole for leaving you for Tasha, don't get me wrong. But since he seems to be regretting it…I say that you at least consider giving him a second chance. He makes you happy. I've hated…well, I've hated seeing you unhappy for so long. It could finally be time for you to be happy again – with the love of your love."

I groaned. _I can't do it. I can't risk getting hurt by him again. I will only stay friends with him. _

But a traitor voice whispered, _Oh really? Looks like you're more than friends judging from that kiss._ I pushed that thought away. "Liss…I…I just can't. Yes, the feelings I had for him came back a lot ever since being holed up here in this ski resort for over a week. But that's not enough to build on. I have to know that he'll love only me forever and that he won't leave me ever again. Not to mention the whole Tasha thing – you know how psychotic she is. Maybe…no."

"I'll think of something," Lissa said determinedly, putting her hands on my shoulders and making me meet her jade green eyes. "In the meantime…we're getting you in a sexy two-piece so it's even more obvious what Dimitri's missing."

I gaped at her. "No way! I'm not going."

"Too bad," Lissa said cheerfully, guiding me towards the bathroom. "Let me work my beauty magic."

* * *

Half an hour later, I was in the pool with Lissa, Christian, Luc, Adrian, Eddie, and Thomas. Well, everyone but Eddie and Thomas. They had insisted on staying out of the pool to keep an eye on things. I couldn't really imagine Eddie or Thomas just relaxing in the pool with us. Tasha and Dimitri had yet to arrive.

"Is there any alcohol?" Adrian asked one of the pretty Moroi girls swimming nearby with her friends.

She giggled and pointed at a table filled with colorful drinks. "Help yourself."

"Thanks, love," Adrian said, turning on a flirtatious smile and she giggled even more before paddling away.

I shook my head when Adrian returned to us, holding what appeared to be a cocktail. "Really? It's almost morning." It was a late night for us (sunset was close) and yet Adrian just kept indulging in alcohol.

He winked at me. "Every day is time for alcohol."

I sighed and shook my head. He really had to learn to quit drinking and smoking so much. I really wondered who would be able to convince him to give up his bad ways.

The door opened and Tasha and Dimitri strolled in. I mentally sighed when I saw Tasha. She was wearing a very skimpy blue bikini that rivaled the color of her eyes. Gee, I wonder whose attention she wants.

And Dimitri...God. He was wearing a simple white V-neck shirt and black swimming trunks, but his simple clothing made him look as fine as hell. I swallowed, aware of how fast my heart was beating.

He took off his shirt and I had to try to avert my gaze as he jumped into the pool. No success whatsoever.

Lissa was grinning at me from where she was floating across the pool with Christian. _I have a feeling you like what you're seeing, don't you?_

My cheeks burned red, but I refused to acknowledge her words.

_Oh c'mon. You can't tell me you're not paying attention to that. Not saying that I'm interested, but his six-pack is pretty impressive…_

I shot her a glare that would've stopped a Strigoi in his tracks. She merely smiled and then doggy paddled across the pool.

Turning my gaze from her, I was shocked to see Dimitri standing in front of me. His dark eyes almost had a hypnotizing effect on me. "Hello, Roza."

I blinked before pinching my arm behind my back. Nope, not a dream. "Hi, Dimitri. Uhm…how…are you?"

I wanted to curse myself. I was Rose Hathaway. I was witty and sassy. I didn't stammer around guys – I talked back and tried to be charming. My normal Rose Hathaway conversation skills had gone MIA.

"Fine," Dimitri replied, his tone warm with affection. He leaned down to my ear and murmured, "I hope…I hope I didn't offend you when I kissed you earlier."

I looked down, unable to meet his eyes. I should've said that I was offended. I should've told him he shouldn't even be talking to me and that he had no right to love me while he was with another woman. I should've lied through my teeth if I had to and convinced him that I was just dwelling on the past.

Suddenly, I was just tired of lies. Of lying that we had no future together when we both loved each other, of lying that I didn't want to be with him… I wanted to speak the truth.

I finally looked up and smiled. "I didn't mind at all, Dimitri."

Dimitri smiled broadly and leaned down to kiss my cheek. I shivered at his lips on my face. "I knew you would finally admit to the truth about what you feel."

When he pulled away, I looked over his shoulder. My blood chilled.

Tasha was glaring at us with a look of absolute hatred. She turned her blue eyes on me, and I could almost read the message in them.

_You are fucking dead. My boyfriend is mine._

Anger flared up in me – and possession. The second feeling startled me because I hadn't felt it so long.

But now it was there. Dimitri loved _me_ and not Tasha. I'd finally allowed myself to realize that. And now… I wanted him to be mine. I wasn't afraid of Tasha. _Bring it on, bitch. Dimitri loves me._ Finally admitting this to myself shattered the denial I'd been trying to force myself into and it was like the world had shifted.

Maybe…if Dimitri did break up with her…there was a future for us after all. I was shocked at how quickly my thoughts had changed and how I wasn't even thinking about Tasha's hurt feelings. But then I remembered how she'd so callously taken him away from me, and my resolve hardened. I wouldn't be the other woman with Dimitri. But if he did break up with her, I was willing to make baby steps to trust him again.

"Dimitri, come here," Tasha snapped, her voice cold.

Dimitri turned around slowly and slowly waded through the water towards her, as if he was being controlled like a puppet. I frowned. _What a strange analogy_.

I couldn't hear what she was saying, even with my heightened hearing, but it was clear she was bitching him out. Their body language made it obvious they were arguing. Dimitri looked quite agitated, and ran his hands through his hair. He opened his mouth to say something, but then…something strange happened.

His eyes glazed over and his face went slack. This was sending off alarm bells and I felt like I'd seen this before.

I watched him for fifteen more minutes. He didn't come back over to me. Instead, he stayed by Tasha's side, occasionally brushing his hand over her shoulder. She kept flirtatiously smiling and brushing her body up against him. Watching them, I felt angry – and alarmed at how stilted Dimitri's movements had become. Something was very wrong, and I didn't understand what was going on.

I turned around, frantically looking for Adrian or Lissa. I waved frantically at Lissa and she swam over. "What's wrong?"

"Look at them," I said in a low voice. I didn't need to say who I was talking about. "What's going on? Why has Dimitri's demeanor completely changed?"

Lissa studied the couple and frowned. She then waved over Adrian and when he was within hearing range, she whispered, "Look at them. Is it me or…"

Adrian squinted over at them and frowned. "No way….That's…that's not…"

"Can someone fill me in on what's going on?" I asked, feeling completely confused.

Lissa and Adrian exchanged a look before speaking as one.

"Compulsion. We see huge amounts of compulsion in his aura."

* * *

**Author's note**: Yayay! Finally got another chapter up. Sorry it's been so long, but it's been awhile since I've written for this so I've kind of forgotten stuff that I actually wrote x_x Still, I hope you guys enjoy this, and I want to thank everyone who's been waiting for another chapter! I think it may be high time I find a beta reader to help me out on this because I'd appreciate a proofreader and someone to help me out here c: Would anyone be interested in beta-ing _My Heart Will Go On_? If anyone is interested, please review/PM :3 Ideas/constructive criticism is always appreciated!

Also...I titled this chapter Stolen because Rose and Dimitri stole a kiss, and towards the end, Tasha kind of "steals" Dimitri back c:


	10. Investigation

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Vampire Academy.

* * *

Ch. 10 Investigation

My mouth dropped. They had to be kidding me. But one look at the serious looks on Lissa's and Adrian's face was enough to convince me otherwise. "_What_?"

"We'll explain once we're out of the pool," Adrian muttered tersely. "There's too many people around to explain what's going on."

My whole world had completely turned upside down. I didn't know how to deal with this new piece of information. Compulsion? How was that possible? And how had Lissa and Adrian been able to see the compulsion (putting their abilities to see auras aside for the moment)?

Compulsion was illegal within the Moroi world. If anyone was caught using compulsion on any anyone, they would receive a huge fine or have to spend a few months in jail. Spirit amplified compulsion to the point where spirit users could use it without being detected.

I slipped into Lissa's mind so I could see things the way she could. She flinched and made a face at me. _I hate it when you do that_, she grumbled. In the past few years, she'd been able to gain an awareness of when I was looking at her thoughts, but I couldn't talk to her in our thoughts.

Lissa turned so that she was looking at Dimitri and Tasha, who were both cuddling up. Dimitri looked a bit uneasy, and kept rubbing the silver watch he was wearing. I shuddered with revulsion at the sight of them cuddling. _Why had his personality did a complete 360? Was it…was it related to compulsion?_ I mused to myself.

Lissa spoke, interrupting my thoughts. _Look at Dimitri's aura. There's a mix of colors, which shows a good strong aura. But if you look closely…there's_ _a shimmery color around his aura. That's a sign of compulsion._

I saw what she'd described and shivered. But something was pulling at my memory as I came back to myself. Hadn't I seen this before?

Suddenly I remembered. It was the first day we'd all gone skiing. I'd seen Dimitri grow jealous at the affection between Adrian and me, but the jealousy in his aura had disappeared. Did the compulsion Lissa and Adrian had just seen tie into what had happened a week ago? My instincts were telling me that there was a connection. I made a mental note to mention that later on.

"We need to talk fast," I murmured, low enough for Adrian to hear.

He sighed and shook his head. "There's nowhere private for us to go now, little dhampir. And by us, I'm assuming you mean me, you, and Lissa."

I nodded.

He sighed again. "Time to break up this party. It's a shame, since I was having such a good time."

* * *

We left Tasha and Dimitri in the pool – I didn't like that, especially since how he'd ignored me after I'd admitted I'd enjoyed the kiss and his personality turned around – but we had important issues to discuss.

After showering, the three of us met in Lissa's room.

"How exactly can you see compulsion now?" I asked. "I know you can sense when someone's lying and see how someone's feeling from their aura…but compulsion?"

"We've only picked it up recently," Adrian explained. "I think since we use spirit more often, we've become more attuned to it. And I know it's compulsion based on the body language and the look on Belikov's face. I've seen that before when I've compelled someone."

"But why would he be compelled?" I wondered aloud. "I mean, I did admit to something to him…and then afterwards he's compelled."

"To stay away from you," Lissa suggested. "We all know how psychotic Tasha is. Maybe she overheard you – I know I did – and decided to compel him to keep him away from you."

I let out a whistle, but my mind was in a complete overdrive. If Tasha had compelled him…did this mean that all the times that he'd stayed away from me at the ski lodge this past week were caused by her compulsion? That seemed the only plausible explanation.

And the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. Just when I'd seen Dimitri go towards Tasha, he'd acted like he was a puppet. Like strings were dragging him towards her. And his stiff and cold demeanor towards me… My God. Was Tasha that eager to keep her beloved Dimitri away from me, now that she knew he loved me?

Then I recalled something and frowned. "Compulsion can't work all the time. Usually someone just compels someone to do something, they do it, and that's the end of it. It's only spirit users whose compulsion is strong enough for the person being compelled to forget."

"Normally, that's true," Adrian agreed. "But Belikov…he's different. He doesn't seem to do whatever and then leave it at that. Most of the time, he sticks to what he's been told to do – but there've been moments where I've seen him fight it. Which is unusual given how strong Tasha's compulsion is. Not as strong as me or Lissa, but strong enough."

"How would Tasha be able to compel him for over a week?" Lissa wondered. "Compelling someone if you're not a spirit user can take a lot out of you."

"I have a feeling that Tasha hasn't been compelling him for a week. For the past seven years when he left me for her," I said. I was shocked by the words coming out of my mouth, but…at the same time, could it be true?

Lissa and Adrian stared at me before recovering. "That does make a bit of sense," Adrian said at last. He sounded uncharacteristically bitter, and I suspected he was disappointed about my theory. If Dimitri had left me for Tasha, that made him an asshole and Adrian might've had a shot with me (besides the fake boyfriend thing). But if Dimitri had been compelled to leave me…it hadn't been his fault.

"But then how could Tasha have kept him under her compulsion for so long?" Lissa persisted. "There's definitely a how to this. There's no way Tasha could've compelled him for years without having some way to amplify her compulsion."

"We'll figure it out somehow," I murmured.

Adrian sighed. I looked over at him, and saw the bitterness in his green eyes. "I'm guessing you want to figure out the compulsion, get him to break up with Tasha, and hopefully start all over with him."

That sounded about right, and I hesitated. How was I supposed to word my explanation so I wouldn't hurt Adrian's feelings? It wasn't like I'd ever dated him (his offer to be my fake boyfriend aside, but I hadn't accepted), but he still sounded pretty hurt. _Why would he still be hurt? _"Well…I…"

Adrian held up his hand, looking weary. "Spare me the explanations. It's fine. I guess I always knew that if you had a chance to return to Belikov, you would take that chance. Doesn't make it any easier though. It's just hard watching him steal your heart again just like the first time we were here."

Now I looked away from him and the heartbroken look in his green eyes. What was I supposed to say to that? There wasn't really anything I could say. Maybe if I'd distanced myself from him after Dimitri left me, then he wouldn't have gotten his hopes up. I'd flirted with him to make Dimitri jealous and came to him with my questions about auras.

Maybe he did have a right to be hurt after all. But despite that, I couldn't bring myself to feel guilty.

"We have to do something," I murmured, getting up and pacing. "I can't stand by and let Dimitri be used like a puppet by that bitch."

"I'm with you," Lissa agreed, instantly on her feet. "

We both turned to Adrian. I held my breath, waiting for his response. Sure, I had Lissa to help…but an extra head was always better than one.

But would Adrian actually agree to help me? Theoretically, he was helping me find a way to reunite with my ex-boyfriend. He wasn't going to be pleased about that.

Adrian rubbed at his temples, not meeting our gazes. Finally, he looked up. "Fine. But I need a drink now."

With that, he was out of the suite and the door slammed behind him.

I sighed. "What do we do from here?"

"Well…I think Adrian and I will have to keep an eye on Dimitri's aura for a few more days," Lissa mused. "We have to prove beyond a doubt that Dimitri is being compelled. I'm 98% sure of it at this point, but we'll do a little more investigating and comparing notes."

"Then what?"

"And then we figure out exactly how Tasha has been compelling Dimitri for seven years."

* * *

Two days passed with Lissa and Adrian further examining Dimitri's aura. I wondered how long we were planning to stay at the lodge. I thought that we were supposed to be here for only two weeks, but from the way things were going, I doubted it. I felt like I'd lost track of the days, but I did know Christmas was four days away, since today was the 21st. I busied myself with shopping while Lissa and Adrian were doing their "studies."

I also kept watch on Tasha and Dimitri myself. I was dismayed to see that Dimitri didn't approach me, even once, but I consoled myself knowing it wasn't his fault. Still, I wondered if his own willpower had allowed him to break free of the compulsion a few times over the years. Now that I had basically confessed my feelings for him, I wanted him to be free of Tasha's compulsion and with me.

Or…at the very least…to be able to choose who he wanted to be with, of his own free will. I didn't really like that – he said he'd loved me, and that he'd always loved me. A negative voice in the back of my mind asked what I would do if I found out he was lying about his feelings for me, and he went back to Tasha…but only this time, of his own volition.

_I'll worry about that when I get there_, I told myself. _He said he loved you. I have to trust him, even if he doesn't come to me now. _

On the third day after Lissa's and Adrian's startling revelation, the three of us met up back in my and Lissa's suite. I wondered aloud why Luc, Thomas, Eddie, or Christian hadn't questioned us about what we're up to. They knew that Adrian wasn't as close to Lissa as I was.

Lissa shrugged. "Christian knows something's on my mind, but knows better than to ask. What would I be able to say? 'We're investigating to see if your aunt has compelled her boyfriend'? As for the rest…I guess if the Moroi aren't in danger, especially us, then they don't really mind not knowing."

Fair enough. "So what have you and Adrian seen in the past two days?" I asked.

Adrian leaned forward. "Lissa and I definitely confirmed it – compulsion is in Belikov's aura. Staggeringly huge amounts, which stays consistent with little dhampir's theory here that Tasha has been wielding compulsion over Belikov for the past seven years."

Lissa continued, "Of course, now that's confirmed…we have to figure out how Tasha's been amplifying her compulsion and how she's been able to keep doing it for the past seven years. I mean, I watched her use a little bit of compulsion on Dimitri…and that was pretty strong. But I don't think she's strong enough to continually compel him for seven years."

"And what exactly has Tasha been compelling Dimitri to do?" I wondered.

"To stay away from you," Adrian said bluntly. I flinched. Nice to have my suspicions confirmed. "To not get near you. Something along those lines."

"But Dimitri must be fighting through the compulsion sometimes," Lissa said breathlessly, brushing a piece of her hair away from her face. "He talks to you sometimes, when he confessed his feelings for you… He must be fighting it!"

Hope sprang up in my chest. So Dimitri hadn't completely been complacent these past seven years. He'd fought it occasionally.

"Maybe when he kissed me, too," I murmured, before I forgot that Adrian was in the room.

_Crap. You shouldn't have said that_, Lissa groaned in my head.

I turned my head so I could see Adrian out of the corner of my eye. He looked…pretty furious. His eyes blazed with an angry fire, and my breath almost caught.

Then the fire vanished, and Adrian was back to himself, muttering angrily under his breath. I heard the words "that fucking bastard," "asshole," and "cradle robber" and scowled.

"Watch it, Ivashkov," I warned.

Adrian took a few deep breaths before he spoke. "Looks like…Belikov has struck again." I could imagine he wanted to put a different word instead of Belikov, and I narrowed my eyes at him.

"Moving on. So Lissa did have a point a few days ago. There has to be a way Tasha's been amplifying her compulsion…but how?"

Adrian shrugged, but I could tell from his defensive posture that he wasn't as nonchalant as he seemed. "Beats me. I doubt she's got a spirit user handy, because we're on the lookout for spirit users. Unless she kidnapped some spirit user and is hiding one in her cellar."

Lissa winced at Adrian's words. She had been kidnapped by Victor Dashkov, a friend of her family before they'd died, years ago when we'd returned to St. Vlad's after we'd escaped for two years. He'd kidnapped her because he was slowly dying of the chronic disease Sandovsky's Syndrome, which would kill him and prevent him from being King, and wanted her force her to use her spirit powers to heal him.

Suddenly I remembered – while Victor had Lissa kidnapped, he'd tried to distract me and Dimitri with a lust charm that would make us give in to our base instincts.

Dimitri had told me that Victor, being an earth user, had put a lust spell and compulsion into the necklace he'd given me.

Was it possible that Tasha knew an earth user who had helped her out by putting compulsion into some jewelry or silver object that Dimitri had?

I eyed Lissa and Adrian. I'd never told anyone – not even Lissa – about the lust charm. I doubted Adrian would take it well. How to explain how I knew about earth users and compulsion in jewelry?

I suddenly had another flashback. Back at Victor's trial at the Royal Court, Dimitri and I had testified that Victor had given us a compulsion charm so that I would fight Dimitri. That was the perfect explanation without giving away the lust charm – and it was true.

I said, "An earth user." Lissa and Adrian turned to me, looking surprised. "Earth users can put compulsion into silver objects or jewelry. I remember the night Lissa was kidnapped, Victor had tried to distract me and Dimitri with a compulsion spell. Dimitri told me that bit about the earth users when we were going to rescue Liss. And we testified about that during the trial."

Lissa lit up. "That's it! I forgot about that. Tasha must have an earth user friend who she got to put compulsion into…something."

"If that's what's going on, then what is Tasha using?" Adrian asked, sounding skeptical.

I tried to think. I closed my eyes, trying to visualize anything Dimitri wore that compulsion could be put in to.

Then I had it. My eyes flew open. "His watch. I'm no jewelry expert, but it must be made out of silver. Or something. If we get it away from him…" Finally, would we have a chance to be together at last? I didn't want to have so much hope, but I couldn't help myself.

"We'll get it away from him somehow," Lissa said confidently, patting my hand. _I'm definitely helping you on this. _

"But putting compulsion into an object requires constant renewal," Adrian mused. "It's not like the compulsion will stay in the jewelry forever."

"How long?" I asked.

He shrugged. "About a month or so, then the compulsion begins to lessen. It must be renewed every two months or no more compulsion can be put in."

"How can we get the watch _away_ from Dimitri? If he doesn't wear it, Tasha must know something is up," I said in frustration.

"There must be times when he takes it off when he's around you," Lissa reminded me. "Or in the shower. Or something."

I threw my hands up into the air. "Even breaking and entering is beyond my skills, Liss. I can't just break into his suite and steal the watch!"

"It's either that, or lose Dimitri to Tasha even more," Lissa said flatly. "Maybe getting the watch doesn't necessitate breaking and entering. Maybe we just have to be sneaky about it."

I snorted. "Sneaky is not my forte."

"We'd have to do some reconnaissance of their suite," Adrian said, sounding like he disapproved of this whole idea of breaking in. "Maybe one of the other guardians would help. Or even better…Christian."

"Can we not involve Christian?" Lissa begged. "I can just imagine the look on his face if I told him what I'm up to!"

"He has the best chance of getting in more easily than the rest of us," Adrian pointed out. "Tasha's his aunt. Less suspicious if he goes to their suite."

Lissa groaned and covered her face with her hands. "Oh, God. I don't…I don't know what to say…" After a moment, she uncovered her face. "I'll see what I can do to convince him to do this for you, Rose. Or me, I should say."

I looked over at Adrian. "Would you…would you help us?" I asked quietly, knowing I had to be breaking his heart.

He laughed, but there was no humor in it. "Help? Help the girl I love get back with her ex-boyfriend aka the love of her life? Especially when he was just the worse asswipe to her? What rational guy would actually agree to helping with this? No one would. Who would want to let the one they loved slip away from them and into someone else's arms? Especially when the person in question is the love of someone's life. God. I don't even know what I'm doing anymore. Fuck. I don't... I must be going fucking crazy."

Lissa and I stared. I wondered if Adrian was starting to slip into the insanity that spirit would eventually lead to when he recovered.

"I'll help you with this. But this is the last time I'll help with anything relating to your love life, Rose. After this…I'm out. I'll only be your friend and not a partner in crime, if you'll excuse the pun. If Belikov doesn't want you after what you've done for him…well, he's a fool." With that, Adrian shot me a side glance, his eyes glinting with anger, and slammed the door behind him like two days ago.

I groaned. "Now what do we do? I just pissed him off."

_Nothing, really_, Lissa answered. _But now we have more important things to do. I'll have to call Christian, fill him in, and do some planning_.

"Planning?"

_Planning how to break in and steal Dimitri's watch so we can break the compulsion._

* * *

**Author's note**: Hi everyone! Another chapter for your reading enjoyment :) It's been getting a little easier to write since I put up Ch. 9. Hoping that the progress will continue. Reviews/ideas will always be welcome :)

And now, to those readers who have been paying attention, your suspicions about that watch have been confirmed ^^ And now that big secret is out... all hell will break out soon


	11. The Watch Theft

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Vampire Academy.

* * *

Ch. 11 The Watch Theft

Planning how to break in and steal Dimitri's watch was…difficult, to say the least.

Lissa filled Christian in on what we were doing. He was astonished to hear that his aunt had been using compulsion on Dimitri, and struggled between who to side with. He finally told us that he would side with us because he didn't want Dimitri to be with Tasha just because of compulsion.

"Although I don't know how exactly I can help you in getting Aunt Tasha to…I don't know…release her grip," Christian said dryly.

"Maybe a little breaking and entering will do it," I muttered.

"_What_?" he demanded, his blue eyes full of shock.

I shrugged. "Hey. I'm not a big fan of it either. But we've got no choice."

He turned to Lissa. "So you're recruiting me because I have more access to Aunt Tasha's room."

She looked embarrassed but nodded. "Adrian's idea."

"Who knew Adrian could be smart," Christian grumbled under his breath. "Okay I'll do a little scouting, but I hope you have a backup plan."

Once Christian left to go to Tasha's, we tried to hash out backup plans.

"Maybe you could arm wrestle Dimitri and 'accidentally' break his watch," she suggested.

"He's stronger than me. Don't forget, he's one of the most badass guardians around besides my mom," I pointed out.

Lissa tried again. "Maybe you could dress up as a maid and clean up their suite but take the watch."

I frowned. "How can I pull that off? Do you have a wig and contacts?"

Now she frowned too. "I don't know…Wait. Maybe I could try to disguise you with spirit."

"But how?"

"Hmm. If I was able to cause Jesse to see things that aren't really there…then theoretically I should be able to use spirit to create a disguise for you. If you're disguised as some new maid, then if Tasha begins questioning everyone, then no one could get in trouble."

"Yeah, but you have to keep in mind you don't know how to do that," I reminded her. "And the more spirit you use, the more likely you'll…" I trailed off, unable to finish.

_Go insane_, Lissa finished for me. _I know. And I don't think I can learn fast enough about illusion charms or whatever. But just keep it in mind, okay? If you can't break in, we'll have to fall back on this._

"Unless someone can think of an idea," I murmured.

There was a knock on the door and I stood up. "Christian's back so soon?"

Lissa shook her head and concentrated on the door. "It's Adrian."

Spirit users could sense each other from their auras, which did come in handy sometimes.

I opened the door and Adrian stood there. The smell of alcohol wreathed him, but I made no comment on that. As long as he didn't smoke…I supposed alcohol was the lesser of two evils.

"Any ideas yet?" he asked, almost stumbling into the room. I grabbed his arm to keep him from falling before shutting the door and leading him to sit on one of the beds.

"Somewhat. It's either breaking and entering, or using spirit to create an illusion," I answered wearily.

"Maybe you could just convince Tasha and Belikov to have some drinks with me at the bar and get them tipsy," Adrian slurred. "Once they're out, you can remove that watch."

I snorted. "Even for you, that's a stupid idea." I couldn't imagine Dimitri drinking, letting alone drinking enough to get tipsy or drunk.

Lissa beamed. "Hey, that's a possibility. Get them out of it and then take the watch."

I stared at her. "You've got to be kidding me. That's like….drugging them!"

"Who said anything about slipping things into their drinks?" she asked. "Maybe get them some stronger alcohol…"

"Why are you even going along with this idea? It's crazy! Neither of them even drink that much. I sincerely doubt they will want to have a drink – or more – at a bar with Adrian here."

"They will if I _convince_ them," Lissa said mischievously.

I shook my head. First she'd disapproved of Adrian using compulsion a few days ago, but now she was all for it. Wonderful.

* * *

Christian returned a few hours later. "Dimitri almost never takes off the watch," he reported. "He did leave me and Aunt Tasha to shower, and I _think_ he took it off then, but I'm not sure."

"Great. Not only do we have to do a break in, but I have to break in _while_ Dimitri's showering," I groaned.

"I'm guessing it varies from day to day," Lissa added. She thought about it a while longer before turning to me. "What do you think is the best plan?"

"Whichever way doesn't have me get caught the fastest."

"Okay. Let's start with something simple – trying to get Tasha and Dimitri drunk," Lissa said, holding her hand out. "If I combine my compulsion with Adrian's, that should be enough to distract them."

"Adrian said Tasha's compulsion is strong, so don't leave that part out," I grumbled.

Christian looked from me to Lissa, and I couldn't blame him for looking so lost. Poor guy. Now he had to deal with how his aunt was a psycho bitch.

"Okay. So we try that first, and then if that doesn't work…break in time," Lissa finished.

"Yeah, but you haven't even figured out how to work your compulsion with Adrian's," I protested.

* * *

That same night was the beginning of the theft. Kind of.

After a long, boring, formal dinner (hosted by the Ivashkovs – the queen herself hadn't attended), Adrian made the suggestion that we all find a nice bar to go drink at.

"But I wanted to go ski early tomorrow," Tasha protested. "A little after sunset."

I checked my watch and saw that there were two hours to "midnight". It was hard for me to repress the urge to recoil at the sight of her. Now with the knowledge that she'd been compelling Dimitri for years… I hated her even more. She was insecure to the point that she had forced her to stay by his side.

It broke my heart to see Dimitri by her side, a quiet shadow of his former self. I'd caught glimpses of the passionate, strong man he used to be over the past few days. I suspected that that personality was now buried under the compulsion Tasha was wielding over him.

Our eyes met for a moment, and I could see something fighting in his eyes. Then he looked away from me, and the moment was broken.

"It'll be a quick drink," Lissa said easily, and her voice sounded so smooth and persuasive. "Don't leave anyone out."

I shivered as I felt the compulsion through the bond. I was more resistant to compulsion because of our bond, but it didn't mean I couldn't feel it.

I looked over at Tasha, and I could see a glazed look in her eyes. I hid a smile. It was her turn to get a taste of her own medicine.

"Erm…fine. One drink," Tasha mumbled, her eyes locked with Lissa's.

We all went down to the main lobby, where there was a bar. Plenty of well-dressed Moroi with some guardians were milling around the lobby.

Thanks to Adrian, we were promptly seated at a table near a window. Thomas and Luc had begged out of coming with us, although Eddie tagged along to watch over Christian.

We each made our own orders and I heard Adrian whisper something into the bartender's ear, since we were sitting so close to each other. "Make the last two drinks a little stronger."

I felt a little nervous. Our plan of stealing the watch was about to be put into action.

Our drinks came very quickly, and I took very small sips of my champagne. Eddie had only ordered a juice. Everyone else was vicariously downing their drinks.

"Wow. T-this tastes g-g-great," Tasha slurred, holding up her empty glass. "I think I'll order another."

To my astonishment, Dimitri raised his half-empty glass as well. "Great idea, Tasha."

Adrian slapped down a few dollar bills on the table. "Next round's on me!"

I shot a look at Lissa after she'd finished her drink. How would she be able to use compulsion if she was drunk? She seemed to sense my gaze, and slowed down on her drinking.

Two rounds later, Tasha, Dimitri, Christian, and Adrian were extremely drunk. Lissa and I were a bit tipsy, and Eddie was the only sober one out of all of us.

He surveyed us in dismay. "How am I supposed to get all of you back up to your rooms? Where's Thomas or Luc when I need them?"

"Me and Liss can probably help Tasha and Dimitri," I managed to say. "Just get Adrian and Christian up."

"All by myself," he muttered. "Calling backup."

Lissa and I then had to lead the drunken couple up their suite. Tasha was giggling and chattering away animatedly. Dimitri kept swaying unsteadily when he walked, so I had to support some of his weight.

We helped them into their suite and then had them lie down on the bed. I looked nervously to Lissa. _Now_, she said.

I looked down at Dimitri's wrist. The key to freeing him was right in front of me. I tried my best not to jostle Dimitri's arm as I desperately tried to unfasten it.

_Hurry_, Lissa begged. _They both seemed out of it, but who knew how long they'd be out._

Then Dimitri's eyelids fluttered and he opened his eyes. I froze. _Oh, _shit.

"What are you doing?" he murmured. _Fuck, fuck, fuck_.

I dropped his wrist like he'd burned me. "It looked a little loose so I wanted to put it back on," I quickly lied. That was the lamest excuse ever. I hope he was too drunk to realize it.

"Might as well take it off," he mumbled before easily loosening it and leaving it right next to me.

I looked at the watch, a million thoughts swirling through my head. _Should I take it? Would Dimitri remember if it was me? Would Tasha suspect it's me, since she's out cold?_

Lissa shook her head at me. _Don't. They might remember later that we were the last two to be with them. We need to try again when no one is looking so no one will get in trouble. No one must suspect us. _

I wanted to scream in frustration. I was so close, but so far away…. I had been so close to freeing Dimitri. I felt like I'd failed him. _I'll free you soon_, I vowed.

Looking back at him one last time, I followed Lissa out and shut the door behind me.

* * *

The next day, Lissa had a better idea. We would go ski with Tasha, and then Lissa would suggest that Tasha go with her to get some type of beauty treatment. Lissa would somehow engineer so Dimitri had an "accident" and then I would break into the suite while he was showering.

"We're leaving one major factor. How do I get into the room?" I asked.

Lissa held up a keycard triumphantly. "With this. I stole it from their room last night."

I let out a whistle. "You are evil."

"Why thank you," she said, sounding pleased.

"So what exactly is the plan?" I asked.

Lissa started, "It does involve spilling things on Dimitri…"

We called up Tasha and arranged to go skiing. Luc decided to tag along this time, but Thomas didn't.

After we'd gone skiing for two hours, we went back inside the lodge for some drinks. I'd about drained half my juice when Lissa nudged me.

_Action_, she murmured.

Before I knew exactly what she was doing, she pretended to slip and bumped into me. I wobbled backwards and splashed my apple juice onto Dimitri's shirt.

I stared, horrified by the mess. "Oh my God. I'm so sorry!"

"It's not a big deal," Dimitri said with a shrug.

Tasha was fussing over him, and it was sickening to watch and hear her. "Are you okay? It was just juice right? I hope that you won't get sick."

"You can't get sick from spilled apple juice," I retorted acidly, glaring daggers at Tasha.

"Yes, you can, if the juice is from sluts like you," she sneered, a cold smile on her face.

I couldn't believe what I'd just heard. Slut? She'd just called me a _slut_? Sure, people at St. Vlad's had said that about me – but that was in high school. This was on a whole different scale.

Without thinking, I snapped, "Well, at least I didn't get so desperate to have Dimitri that I made him break up with his previous girlfriend."

Tasha opened her mouth to retort, but Adrian broke in. "_Enough_," he said, looking from me to her before locking eyes with her. "Be more courteous to your guests."

Lissa then stepped in. "Tasha, maybe we could pamper ourselves at the beauty spa," she said. "Let's spend a few hours there. In fact, let's go now."

Tasha blinked, mesmerized by Lissa's eyes, before replying. "Sure. Let's go right now."

Lissa smiled before dropping her gaze from Tasha's. Tasha blinked, momentarily stunned, before shaking it off and following Lissa.

_This will probably be the only chance that you get to break in_, Lissa warned me as she stepped across the lobby. _If necessary, have Christian or Adrian stand guard for you while Dimitri's in the shower. I'm planning to keep Tasha occupied for at least two hours_.

Dimitri looked down at his soaked shirt and sighed. "I'll just change this and workout at the gym before hitting the shower."

I froze. This was my window of opportunity. But how long would Dimitri be hanging out at the gym?

Adrian leaned in and whispered, "I'll keep an eye on Belikov and I'll let you know when he's heading up."

I nodded. That was all I could ask for. As for breaking in and sneaking out…I was on my own.

We watched Dimitri walk away. I sighed. "The start of my life as a cat burglar begins."

"I'll text you when Dimitri heads into his room," Christian said, sounding uncomfortable. "I hope you don't have to steal the watch from right his nose – which is virtually impossible."

I made a face. "Just shut up and get moving okay?"

* * *

About an hour and a half later, I got a text from Adrian. _Belikov's on the move back to his room_.

I looked over at the clock. About three A.M. I had to get ready to move any moment. I spent the next five minutes waiting for Christian's text, agitatedly pacing around my room.

Then Christian texted me. _Dimitri's in his room. I say give it ten minutes before you sneak in_.

I followed Christian's advice and I was in front of Dimitri's and Tasha's door ten minutes later. I'd even put on gloves, so if there was an investigation, there would be no record of my fingerprints. I took a deep breath, steeled myself, and slid the keycard in.

There was a low beeping sound, which made me wince. If I made too much sound, I would give myself away. I doubted Dimitri would be too keen on letting me have a look at his watch. I slowly slid the door open and heard the very loud sounds of Dimitri rummaging around in the bathroom. Perfect. The loud sounds would hopefully block my own sounds out, since dhampirs had excellent senses.

I tiptoed in, leaving the door slightly ajar behind me. I held my breath until I heard the telltale sounds of the shower being started and then looked around.

The suite was huge, much like the one I shared with Lissa. Bed, living room area, and probably a huge bathroom.

I had just stepped up to the bed and begun shifting through Dimitri's clothes on the bed when suddenly I heard Lissa's voice in my mind.

_Crap. We just finished our beauty treatments early. We're going to be up in less than ten minutes, and I got a text from Christian that you just got in! Clear out in less than five minutes!_

Fuck. If I was caught… I didn't even want to think about what Tasha would do, not to mention what she might do to Dimitri. I had to find the watch and clear out as fast as I could. The stakes had just been raised in the search.

I frantically went through Dimitri's clothes on the bed. The watch wasn't there. Fuck, fuck, fuck, where the hell was it? I turned around, scanning the desks and nightstands. Nothing there either.

I knew that if Dimitri had kept the watch with him in the bathroom, chances of me retrieving it while he was showering were slim to none. I checked the drawers in the nightstands but there was nothing there. I wanted to scream in frustration, but that would bring Dimitri running in from his shower. _Where was the fucking watch? _I was getting more agitated by the moment.

I quietly ran into the living room area, pulling down pillows and looking under the couches. Nothing again.

I was about to seriously consider how I could sneak into the bathroom when I saw the silver watch half-buried under some of Tasha's belongings. I almost wanted to groan as I picked it up. It had been sitting almost in plain sight.

My skin tingled as I touched it. I had a feeling that it was part of Tasha's compulsion. I shoved the watch into my pocket and surveyed the mess I'd made. I had no time to clean it up before Tasha arrived. Then I was hit by inspiration. Maybe I could make it look like someone had broken in…

I quickly threw the pillows haphazardly on the ground before racing into the bedroom area and quickly throwing the clothes all over the place. I went over to the desk and messed up some papers before pulling out drawers.

The shower was suddenly turned off. "Hello? Is anyone there?" Dimitri called out, sounding concerned.

I ran for the door and shut it behind me, my heart pounding from the adrenaline. I looked left and right. Which way to go to avoid Tasha?

I decided that going right was the best bet, since the elevators were in the opposite direction, and tore off right before Dimitri opened the door.

* * *

When Lissa and Adrian came to my (or mine and Lissa's) suite a few minutes later, I leapt up. "Got it?" Adrian asked.

I nodded and pulled the watch out of my pocket.

Lissa and Adrian took the watch and huddled around it to study it. "The compulsion is strong," Lissa murmured, briefly touching it. "It's…it's really close to that of a spirit user's."

"That's probably because the earth user combined their compulsion with Tasha's," Adrian grumbled. "I really need to look into that."

Their talk got more technical until I didn't really get what they were talking about. I interrupted. "Hey, do you think taking the watch away helped with getting Dimitri back to normal?"

"Hard to say," Lissa said. "Let's say there's three levels of compulsion – low, medium, and strong. For very low-level compulsion, just take the object away and I'm guessing the person under compulsion will be okay. Medium…I guess it's the same. But for strong compulsion like this…it might take awhile for the compulsion to fully wear off."

"How about if I destroy it?" I asked.

Lissa and Adrian stared at me before switching their gaze back to the watch. "That should probably do it," Adrian said, but he sounded reluctant. "I would've liked the chance to study a little bit of this though…"

I tried to raise my eyebrows at him but failed. Adrian was actually interested in the compulsion in the watch?

Lissa put her hand on his arm. "We have to make it one hundred percent sure that Dimitri regains his own control."

"Why not see if Belikov's already free from compulsion now?" he argued.

"Things are suspicious enough as it is! He's not that close to us, and if we suddenly start to talk to him…it might look like we're trying to fish around for something. Better destroy it – or at least – damage it so Dimitri's fine for sure. Even if it's unnecessary."

They exchanged a long look for a moment before Adrian turned to me. "Fine. Destroy it."

I picked up the watch and smashed it onto the floor.


End file.
